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pipsyy · 1 month ago

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detestable...

enemies to lovers dom!hamzah x f!reader

hi everyone! i have had the most absolutely terrible writer's block recently, which is why this fic has taken so long. but i hope you enjoy regardless! please send me reqs if you have them!

summary: y/n absolutely hates hamzah, detests him, actually. until one day, when that undeniable feeling of angers burns into an even hotter flame.

warnings: SMUT SMUT SMUTTY SMUTTING SMUT SMOT! DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 18.

word count: 3066

You loved your life. Your home, your animals, your friends, your youtube channel, everything. There was nothing about your life that irked you. Except for one thing. Him. Hamzah. You had become friends with Mandy over two years ago, over similar interests and styles of youtube channels, and had met Hamzah about six months into your friendship with her. You had never met somebody like him before. You got along with everyone, even if they slightly pissed you off, you were able to stomach their presence and create minimal amounts of respectable small talk. But not with Hamzah. In fact, when you were first invited over to Mandy’s house for a party and heard he was going to be there, you were excited. You had seen his online presence and thought he was funny, charming, and kind, only to find out upon meeting him that the complete opposite was the truth. He was awkward, and weird, and nothing at all like you thought he would be. The two of you were unable to mesh a single comfortable conversation together and, since then, you had effectively avoided him like the plague.

The angry tension between the two of you finally exploded one Friday night. You had been invited to dinner at Mandy’s house, and you were ecstatic. You imagined your night playing out with the two of you cooking and baking delicious food, sharing some with Martin in his man-cave, then diving into the delicacies in front of a cozy fall movie. What you did not expect was Hamzah to be there.

“Hey, y/n!” Mandy said excitedly, as she opened the door and welcomed you into her home. “Are you ready for tonight?”

“Oh my god,” you said, grasping her hands in yours. “You have no idea! I’ve been looking forward to it all day.” You took your shoes off before following the brunette into the kitchen. The two of you were laughing and talking until you stopped dead in the middle of the kitchen, starting out towards the living room. Two male heads were positioned together on the couch, one with straight, almost black, locks and the other with luscious, dark curls. You would recognize those curls anywhere. Shit.

You grabbed Mandy by her forearm and whispered in her ear, “I didn’t know he would be here.”

“Who?” she asked cluelessly, swiveling her head to where your wide-eyed gaze was fixated upon. “Oh, right…Hamzah. Martin and him filmed a video today and he’s not leaving until later. I’m so sorry, y/n. I really tried to get him out of the house, but he insisted on staying for dinner.” You knew that Hamzah liked to rile you up, he made it abundantly clear whenever the two of you would have a conversation.

“He just wants to piss me off,” you responded. “It’s okay. We can just ignore them and have fun.” Mandy smiled at you. The two of you began gathering items and ingredients from around the kitchen to make the dinner. You had decided on making fettuccine alfredo with broccoli and chicken over text with pumpkin cream cheese cupcakes for dessert. The two of you labored over the pasta for almost an hour, laughing and giggling over every single thing. The boys mainly kept to themselves, occasionally laughing softly at the game they were playing on the TV. You paused from stirring the cheesy sauce, simmering softly in the pan.

“You can go ahead and combine this sauce with the pasta, Mandy,” you said, nudging the brunette girl with your elbow. “I’m going to head to the bathroom real quick.” You went to the bathroom down the hall and completed your business, flushing the toilet and washing your hands. As you exited the bathroom, you ran right into a pair of broad, muscular shoulders. You look up, an apology bubbling from your lips, until you meet a pair of wide, dark eyes: Hamzah. His eyes narrow and his brow furrows. Your lips curl into a sneer, the close proximity of him causing hot, red anger to flare in your chest. The two of you attempt to get around each other, moving in sync. This annoying act continued until Hamzah’s large hands grip your waist and practically lifted you up, moving you out of his way. He continued down the hallway to the guest room without looking back, leaving you stunned into silence in the middle of the hallway. Your waist tingled lightly where his hands had touched you. The way his large hands were able to almost completely engulf your waist, followed by how effortlessly he had lifted you, caused inappropriate, unwanted thoughts to flow through your mind. You shook your head, internally scolding yourself for your rash behavior. When you reunited with Mandy in the kitchen, she gave you a confused look.

“You okay?” she asked. No doubt your silent demeanor and red face giving away some of your internal embarrassment.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you responded, unconvincingly.

“You sure?” she pressed. “I saw Hamzah leave and I just thought–”

“Yes!” you snapped, cutting her off. “I am perfectly fine.” You ran a hand through your hair and Mandy laughed, shaking her head at your idiocy.

“If you say so, girl.” The night continued smoothly once you had calmed yourself down from your strained interaction with Hamzah. The pasta was cheesy and delicious, followed by the brownies which were sweet and rich with chocolate. Mandy shared the brownies with the two boys, Martin full of compliments and praise for the two of you, while Hamzah enjoyed his in silence, glancing at you every so often with a wide-eyed stare that made you feel both uncomfortable and anxious. Throughout the night, Martin and Mandy exchanged coy looks, giggling under their breath at something that seemed to you like an inside joke, but you were unsure. Finally, you reached your breaking point, and blurted out your confusion at the couple’s strange attitude.

“What the hell are you two plotting?” you asked. The couple exchanged a knowing look, smirking at each other.

“Plotting?” Mandy repeated. “We’re not plotting anything.”

“I know you are,” you said.

To your utter surprise, Hamzah chimed in in agreement. “Yeah,” he said, mouth full of brownie. “You’re both acting so weird. What’s going on?”

Mandy gave Martin another weird look, the two nodding at each other in joint agreement. “Well…” Mandy said. “There’s this movie that Martin and I have been dying to see and it comes out today. We’re going to leave to see it now.”

“And we know that the two of you have some unsettled differences,” Martin chimed in. “So while we go out to see this movie, the two of you are going to stay here and figure them out.”

“Are you serious, Mandy?” you said, exasperation at this situation obvious in your voice. You glanced at Hamzah who had undeniable shock plastered all over his face. “No…” you said, as the couple began to pack up their things and pull their shoes on in quick succession. “No, no, you’re not doing this.”

“We’ll just leave the house, Martin,” Hamzah said.

“We’re locking the two of you in,” the brunette replied. “You’re not getting out this easy. The way you two absolutely despise each other pisses us off. So, you’re both not leaving until you have established some sort of mutual camaraderie or something like it. Understand?” You and Hamzah stood up from the table in protest, but it was too late, Mandy and Martin left the house in sync, locking the door from the outside. The two of you were trapped, together and alone, for an uncomfortable, inestimable amount of hours. You let out a sigh of pure frustration, understanding that the following couple of hours were going to be the most uncomfortable and angry you had felt in a while.

“Well, shit,” Hamzah said, sitting back down and folding his arms across his broad chest.

You rolled your eyes. “This is fucking ridiculous,” you said. “There’s no way I’m doing this.” You get up and pace the wooden floor, head lowered as you think of all the ways you could escape Hamzah and his brown-eyed gaze that you could feel following your every move.

“Oh, come on,” he said, standing up from his seat. He moved in front of you, blocking your path, looking down at you with a facetious smirk that boiled your blood. “It can’t be that bad.”

“Oh, trust me,” you said, maneuvering around the larger man. “It can and it is.” Hamzah reached out, fast as lightning, and grabbed your forearm. The slight touch sent undeniable shivers down your spine, which you hated. He turned you around to face him, the two of you inches from one another. You gazed down at his hand, still wrapped around your forearm.

“Am I really that detestable to you, y/n?” he asked, voice at a decibel so low you had to crane your ears to even hear him. The inches between the two of you began closing, his eyes—so brown they looked black—drawing you closer. Dark, seductive images flitted through your mind: Hamzah’s large hands gripping your waist, his lips on your neck, hands fisting your hair, gripping your throat, touching your cunt. Shocked, you wretch your forearm out of his grasp.

“Yes,” you breathed out, chest heaving, mind reeling from your stupid imagination and wandering mind. “You are that detestable.”

“Really?” Hamzah asked, voice no louder than a whisper. You realized as your back hit the wall that he had backed you into a both physical and mental corner. You gulped as he drew closer and closer. “Because—I think—you like to think of me as something more than just detestable.”

“I don’t like to think of you at all, Hamzah,” you said, skin burning as his dark eyes remained locked on yours, unyielding in their direct gaze.

“You don’t?” he said, scoffing. He leaned closer, lips practically brushing yours. His large hands maneuver to grip your waist, and you don’t even try to stop him. “Not at all, huh. Not even at night, when you’re alone in your bed.” His grip on your waist tightened and shockwaves of undeniable pleasure flash through your spine like needles. “Cause I do. All the fucking time.” You look up at him, eyes widened in shock. He curses, the grip on your waist tightening so hard you thought it would bruise. “Don’t,” he said, voice rough and gravely. “Don’t fucking look at me like that…or I’m going to do something we both will regret.”

You had never expected to feel this way about Hamzah. But seeing him—a man so stupid and narcissistic and haughty—reduced to this…reduced to a quivering mess of a man with needy desperation written all over him, you felt that you couldn’t help yourself. You whimpered as your core tightened. Your back brushed the wall and Hamzah leaned impossibly closer, chest brushing against your own.

“Tell me,” he said. “Tell me you don’t want this.” You froze, the repeated words brushing your lips, bubbling up inside you. But you couldn’t lie. You couldn’t say them. For deep down inside you, in a place you had buried since you got to know him, lay the dirty, red-hot truth. You wanted him too, equally as bad. Your shaking hands, puppeteered not by your brain, but by that stupid feeling deep in your heart, reached up to intertwine behind Hamzah’s neck, grasping at the delicate curls at his nape. Hamzah’s eyes widened at the realization that you weren’t backing away.

“I can’t,” you confessed. Hamzah, lips quivering with desire, leaned closer, brushing your soft and plush mouth with his own. Unable to contain your palpitating desire, you tightened your grip on his curls and pulled him into you, pressing your lips violently together. Your lips locked together, a wet mess of tongue and spit as you desperately clung to each other. Hamzah’s hands ran up and down your body, unsure of what part of you he wanted to touch first, desperate for everything, all at once. He separated from your lips, and you let out a needy, unfiltered whine at the lack of contact. Hamzah began kissing down your neck, suckling on that sweet spot behind your ear that made you cry out in pleasure.

“You have no idea,” he whispered, in between open-mouthed kisses planted on your neck. “You have no fucking idea what you do to me.” You whimpered at the blunt confession, hands yanking at his curls. His hands grabbed at your ass, lifting you up effortlessly as you wrapped your legs around his waist. Hamzah roughly pushed you up against the wall, lips connecting with your own again. You yanked at his t-shirt and he paused his motions, pulling it over his head and throwing it somewhere in the room. You came face-to-face with his body, ribbed and muscular from his time in the gym, while also maintaining enough tummy to make your thighs squeeze together. You mirror his movements, pulling your tanktop off and shucking your sweats down your legs, leaving you in your bra and underwear. Hamzah looks at you starstruck.

“Holy shit,” he whispered, reaching to grasp at your covered tits. “You’re even prettier than I imagined.�� You giggled slightly, a gesture that never occurred to you would happen with Hamzah. Hamzah sunk down to his knees, leaving little kisses along your stomach and the underside of your tits. Kissing and biting your inner thighs, he dragged your underwear down your legs, mouth agape as you came face-to-face with your soaking cunt. He looked up at you with wide eyes, pupils dilated, and you felt your knees weaken. Hamzah grabbed one of your thighs after the other, wrapping your legs around his shoulders practically sitting on him, leaning against the wall. He continued to leave little kisses along your legs, suckling purple bruises onto your inner thighs.

“Hamzah–” you whine, tightening your grip in his curls.

“Use your words, y/n,” he said, looking up at you through his thick eyelashes.

“I need you,” you say, your desperation overwhelming your embarrassment and confusion. Hamzah smirked up at you, before shoving his head deep between your thighs. He licked a long strip up your folds, holding eye contact with you, before circling his tongue around your clit. As his tongue connected with your sensitive bud, you let out a long moan, head tilting back against the wall. Hamzah ate you out like it was his last meal, licking, sucking, and slurping your juices in a constant state of desperation for more. You felt yourself coming closer and closer to your climax, hands tightening his hair as his nose rubbed deep into your clit. You came with a cry, legs shaking around his head as you shuddered and convulsed, white spots bedazzling your vision.

Hamzah lifted you up, wrapping your legs back around his waist and kissed you, mouth stained with your juices. You tasted yourself on his tongue and moaned at the feel of his tongue poking its way into your mouth.

“God, you’re so fucking sexy,” he whispered. “You have no idea how bad I wanted you.”

“Hamzah—” you panted. “I need you inside of me.” He reached down into his pants, pulling out his hard member, stroking it a few times before rubbing it up and down your wet folds. He slid into you with a gasp, the two of you moaning at the feel of him sheathed inside of you. He began slowly thrusting in and out of you, the stretch of his thick cock inside your cunt drawing whimpers from deep in your throat. While your eyes rolled back into your head from the pleasure, Hamzah never broke eye contact.

“God, you’re such a fucking slut,” he said. “You hate me, huh?”

You whimper in response.

“Yeah, you hate me…but you’re still here, being fucked by this cock, huh?” You couldn’t respond, the only sound flowing from you being heady whines and high-pitched moans. You felt yourself inching closer towards another release, one of your hands reaching between your legs to rub your clit. One of Hamzah’s hands wrapped around your throat, squeezing slightly, you realized with a jolt that he was holding you up with one hand. The fact that this man could hold you up and fuck you so good with just the strength of one arm made your core tighten.

“I–I’m gonna cum, Hamzah,” you manage to cry out, dangerously tipping on the precipice of release.

“Oh, yeah?” Hamzah responded breathlessly. “You gonna cum, baby? Shit. Cum for me, pretty girl.” You cum with a strangled yelp falling from your lips.

“Good girl,” Hamzah moaned out, hips beginning to stutter. “Good girl, so pretty, so fucking pretty for me.” Your hands grabbed onto his curls tightly, yanking as you came down from your high. The feel of his dark strands being pulled so tightly sent Hamzah over the edge. Hips stuttering as he came, head buried deep into your neck, he let out a flurry of whimpers and praises. The two of you sat there for a minute, Hamzah breathing heavily into your neck. Just then, you heard the jangle and clank of keys outside of the door. Hamzah’s eyes locked onto yours, wide with shock and fear.

“Shit,” you say. Untangling your limbs, the two of you rushed to dress in five seconds flat. You threw yourselves onto the couch, sitting on opposite ends just as Mandy and Martin opened the door and returned.

“The cinema was closed, guys,” Martin announced as he took off his coat and boots, Mandy close behind him. “Did you at least make up though?”

“Yeah, we did,” Hamzah responded, voice still rough and breathless. The couple finally came into your view, cheeks and ears red from the outside wind. You knew that the two of you were a strange sight: clothes rumpled, cheeks flushed with embarrassment and something dirtier. You also knew that, ever the observer, it would be Mandy to notice.

“Oh my god!” she said, covering her shocked face with a hand. “OH MY GOD, MARTIN!” She yanked on his sleeve, jumping up and down.

“What?!” he asked. “I don’t get it.”

“They fucked, holy shit, they fucked,” she laughed and giggled, jumping up and down with glee. “You owe me a hundred dollars, Martin.”

#hamzahthefantastic #hamzah x reader #hamzah x reader smut #hamzah x y/n #hamzah x you #hamzahfic #hamzahimagines #hamzahthefantastic x reader #slushynoobz #youtube #pleaseineedhimsobadithurts

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scary-grace · 5 months ago

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blind date (shigaraki x reader)

After endless failed attempts to help Tomura up his game, his friends have settled on their last resort: A blind date. Even before you show up, it's not going well. No quirks AU, 2k words.

this was originally in the x reader lovers community, but I figured I'd release it into the wild as well!

Part 1 Part 2

Part 1

Tomura gets being a little late. “A little late” is practically his middle name. He waits until the last minute to do almost everything, and that means any complications mean he’s running behind. Hypocrisy pisses him off so much that he tries to avoid it all costs, so that means he has to put up with it without bitching when somebody else is a little late, too.

Except half an hour isn’t a just a little late for anything, let alone a blind date Tomura didn’t want to go on in the first place. He’s been waiting outside the bar you were supposed to meet at for half an hour, and he’s pissed.

“That’s it,” he says after the eighteenth time a woman his age has walked past and hasn’t been you, whatever the hell you look like. “I’m out of here.”

“Just a little longer, honey,” Magne says. She’s smiling, but she’s also got her arm around Tomura’s shoulders, and if she squeezes any harder, Tomura’s going to pop like a balloon. “She’ll be here.”

“No, she won’t.” Tomura crosses his arms over his chest, tucking his hands in so nothing will bite them. They’re on the waterfront, in the summer, and there are insects everywhere. Whose dumb idea was this? “You showed her a photo of me and she changed her mind.”

“It’s a blind date,” Magne says. Like Tomura’s supposed to know what that means. “She doesn’t know what you look like, either. That’s why you have to stay right here and keep wearing that baseball hat. Otherwise she won’t know it’s you.”

Tomura hates the hat. Right now he hates everything. “So she got here on time, saw me, and left. Can I go?”

Magne shakes her head. “You promised you’d try.”

“I showed up. I waited for fucking half an hour. I’ve tried.” Tomura finally shoves Magne’s arm off his shoulders. “I’m done.”

Tomura wishes he could say he didn’t know how he got here, except he does. One of his friends is getting married, and there’s supposed to be a wild bachelor weekend in Vegas, one last blast of stupid before settling down. Most of the groomsmen are planning to hook up with as many people as possible, and that’s where the problems start. According to his friends, Tomura has no game. Zero game. Negative one hundred game. If he was rolling for his game stat, it would be a critical failure – and none of his friends want to babysit him when they could be getting laid.

Tomura wouldn’t want to babysit when he could be getting laid, either. His solution was to skip the bachelor weekend and just show up for the wedding in his stupid rented suit. But apparently his friends really want him to come to the party, and they decided that what he needed was to get some practice in before the trip. Which means that for the last month, Tomura’s spent every Friday night and weekend getting dragged through his own personal hell.

They made him try dating apps, which were a disaster, even though Tomura let Toga set up his profile and make the first move. Then they tried traditional online dating, which also sucked, because Tomura’s too picky and other people have standards. Hanging out in bars and clubs worked exactly how it’s always worked – it doesn’t – and when Dabi pulled out the big guns and dragged Tomura to the sex club where he met his fiancé, the only people who talked to Tomura were guys. Tomura thought that was sort of a good sign, even though he’s not into men, until he remembered that guys will fuck anything with a hole in it. He’s not high on himself on his best day, but that was a really shitty night.

He thought they were going to quit after that, but his friends had one last ace up their sleeve – a blind date, Magne’s idea, which Toga enthusiastically signed off on when she saw a picture of the woman Magne wanted to set Tomura up with. Toga’s type and Tomura’s type line up, sort of, and Spinner giving the photo two thumbs way up sealed the deal.

It’s not like Tomura was hopeful or anything. He just wanted to get his friends off his back. Still, rejection sucks, and ghosting sucks worse. He’d rather have you show up and tell him to his face that you weren’t interested than stand him up.

Magne collars Tomura again, but her phone starts ringing at the same time, Toga’s contact info popping up. “Don’t go anywhere,” she warns Tomura as she raises the phone to her ear. “We’re here. She’s not here yet. Can you tell him –”

Tomura ducks out from under her arm and books it into the crowd of people on the waterfront, figuring he can make it to the metro stop before Magne figures out which way he’s going. But even that can’t go his way today, because he runs into somebody who’s moving at warp speed in the opposite direction, colliding at the shoulder hard enough to make him stagger. Tomura’s not confrontational, but it’s the wrong fucking day. “Can you watch where you’re going? It’s not like you matter to whoever you’re going to –”

“Are you Tomura?”

Tomura’s heart lurches. He stares hard at you as you right yourself, picking up the backpack you dropped in the collision. There’s no way this is happening. There’s no universe in which his blind date would be someone like you.

He can see right away why Toga and Spinner approved of you, but he thought you’d be someone in his league, not somebody who’s several kilometers above it. Maybe Tomura’s too excited that you actually showed up to evaluate what you actually look like. He looks away, then looks back. Nope – you’re still pretty, even though your face is flushed and you’re breathing hard like you’ve just been running. Did you run here to meet him? Only one way to find out. “I’m Tomura.”

“I’m so sorry,” you say. “My boss held me back at work, and I missed my train –”

You’re wearing some kind of work uniform. Scrubs, maybe. Are you a nurse? “And then I couldn’t decide whether to wait for another train or just run, so I ran – but I don’t really run, so it took even longer –”

Tomura doesn’t run, either. When he was doing the stupid online dating thing, he sorted out everybody who said more than one sentence about working out. You pause to suck down a breath, then keep talking. “I know everything I just said sounds like an excuse, and I know you’re leaving,” you say, “but I was hoping I could catch you so I could say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to stand you up. I get it if you want to call it off.”

Before Tomura can answer or even think about what he’s going to say, Magne bursts out of the crowd. “I told you not to run off,” she scolds, collaring Tomura again. “If you don’t stay put, there’s no way she’s going to – oh! You’re here!”

You nod. Magne looks you up and down. “I told you to dress cute,” she scolds. “And to get here on time. I practically had to chain him to a streetlight so he wouldn’t escape.”

“I’m sorry,” you say. “My boss –”

“Of course,” Magne says, scowling. “He’s never met a good time he doesn’t want to ruin.”

Magne knows who your boss is? “How do you to know each other?”

“She’s a pharmacy tech at the place I go to pick up my E,” Magne says. “She’s the only one who works there who isn’t an asshole, and her boss is the biggest asshole of them all. I only go in there when she’s on and he’s off. But let me introduce you the right way. Shigaraki, this is – ”

Tomura misses your name the first time Magne says it, catches it the second time, but it barely registers except as something he probably shouldn’t forget. You’re pretty. You’re not an asshole, or at least you’re the same kind of asshole as Magne and everybody else Magne’s friends with, including Tomura. Your boss is the wrong kind of asshole, which means you probably didn’t blow Tomura off on purpose. And you ran here so you could meet him even when you knew you were really late. You must have really wanted to meet Tomura. What did Magne tell you about him?

Tomura can ask you about that later. “So?” Magne is saying expectantly. “Can I leave you two alone, or are you going to run away again?”

“No,” Tomura says. “You can go.”

You look surprised. “Um –”

“Now.”

Magne cackles. She snatches the hat off Tomura’s head, ruffles his hair, and slaps him on the back hard enough that he staggers. “Have fun! I want all the details later!”

“Sure,” you say, bewildered, as she kisses you on the cheek. Tomura’s going to have to talk to you about that – any details you share with Magne will be fair game for the rest of Tomura’s friends, and he’s not sure how much he wants them to know. “Um, bye.”

Magne waves and vanishes into the crowd. Now it’s just you and Tomura standing on the sidewalk. You shuffle off to one side, out of the way, and Tomura follows you. “Are you sure you still want to do this?” you ask once you’re both leaning against the railing. “I get it if you’re not in the mood. When I’ve gotten stood up, I haven’t wanted to –”

“You’ve never been stood up in your life,” Tomura says, and your expression changes from confused to offended. “Look at you.”

You look down at yourself, then back up at him. “What does that mean?”

“I didn’t know anything about you and I got here on time. If I knew what you looked like beforehand I’d have been two hours early.” It sounded like a compliment in Tomura’s head, but he can’t tell if you’re taking it that way. “People like you don’t get stood up for dates.”

“I wish that were true,” you say. You look away. “I know how it feels. I get it if you don’t want to go out anymore.”

Tomura pretends he’s thinking about it. “How far did you run to get here?”

“Sixteen blocks.”

“You ran sixteen blocks to meet me. That cancels out being late,” Tomura says. You look up, surprised for a second or two before the relief kicks in. “I still want to go out.”

“Me, too,” you say. You smile at him. Women don’t usually smile at Tomura. People don’t usually smile at Tomura. He doesn’t know what to do with it. “Thanks, Tomura. For giving me a chance.”

“Yeah,” Tomura says. “What do we do now?”

“I don’t really know,” you admit. “It’s been a while since I went on a date.”

“Same,” Tomura says. ‘Never’ counts as a while in his book. “I don’t know – grab drinks or something?”

You nod. “Can we find somewhere to sit down for a second first? I don’t usually run that much, and I don’t want to pass out on you.”

“You can pass out on me if you want,” Tomura says. You blink. Tomura facepalms even though you’re looking right at him. “There are benches back there.”

The crowd on the sidewalk is only getting denser. Tomura doesn’t want to get separated from you, so he tells you to hold onto the back of his shirt. You grab his hand instead, and you’re still holding it when the two of you find a place to sit down. Still holding it once you’re both settled, searching for something to talk about. Tomura’s not optimistic about this. You’re too good to be true – the kind of woman who’d run sixteen blocks to meet him and hold his hand is a kind of woman who doesn’t exist. Even so, it’s – nice. Tomura laces his fingers with yours and decides to enjoy it while it lasts.

#shigaraki x reader #shigaraki tomura x reader #tomura shigaraki x reader #shigaraki x you #x reader #reader insert #man door hand hook car door #a bisquared production

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moomuzan · 12 days ago

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— 𝖇𝖗𝖔𝖐𝖊𝖓 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖒𝖎𝖘𝖊𝖘

requested , you break up with them , angst , chuuya , kunikida , ranpo , dazai x gn! reader , requests are open xoxo

Dim lights suffocated your shared apartment in silence. You sat by the window, staring at the buzzing city that blinked like distant, uncaring stars. Your heart ached in its cage, heavy with the weight of too many broken promises. Too many nights spent waiting, too many lies wrapped in pretty words.

You had told yourself this time would be different. This time, DAZAI would mean it.

When the door creaked open, the faint scent of alcohol drifted in with him. Dazai stood in the doorway, his coat slung carelessly over his shoulder, his hair disheveled. He had that same crooked smile, the one that used to make your heart flutter but now only made it crack a little more.

“Ah, belladonna,” he said softly, shutting the door behind him. “Still awake? You didn’t have to wait for me.”

Your lips pressed into a thin line as you turned to look at him. He noticed the empty wineglass on the table beside you, the untouched plate of food you hadn’t been able to bring yourself to eat. His smile faltered for just a moment, but he recovered quickly, as he always did.

“I got caught up,” he said lightly, shrugging off his coat and draping it over the back of a chair. “You know how it is. Things happen. Time slips away.”

“Time doesn’t slip away, Osamu,” you said, your voice quiet but sharp. “You let it.”

He stilled, his back to you, his hands tightening on the chair. For a moment, the room was silent except for the faint hum of the refrigerator, a hollow sound that filled the space between you. Slowly, he turned, his face carefully blank, though you could see the unease flickering behind his eyes.

“I told you I’d change,” he said softly, stepping toward you. “I told you I’d try—”

“You’ve been saying that for months,” you interrupted, standing up from your seat. Your voice broke on the last word, and you hated how small you sounded, how tired. “And what’s changed, Dazai? What’s actually different?”

His hands twitched at his sides, and for once, he didn’t have a clever response. “I’m trying,” he whispered, his voice almost pleading.

With hitching breath you shook your head, tears spilling over despite how hard you tried to keep them in. “Trying isn’t enough anymore,” you said, your voice trembling. “I gave you everything I had, Osamu. I waited for you, believed in you. And all you ever gave me was pieces of yourself—never enough to hold, never enough to feel whole.”

“Belladonna,” he said, his voice breaking, stepping closer as if the sound of your name could mend the fractures spreading between you. “Please. Don’t—”

“I can’t do this anymore,” you whispered, stepping back from him, your hands trembling as you reached for your bag. “I love you, but loving you feels like drowning. And I don’t want to drown anymore.”

He froze, his face crumbling in a way you had never seen before. The ever-present mask slipped away, leaving behind a raw, aching vulnerability that nearly stopped you in your tracks. “Don’t leave,” he said, his voice cracking, desperate. “I’ll do better. I’ll—”

But you shook your head, your heart shattering even as you turned away. “I’ve heard it all before,” you murmured, your voice barely audible. “And I don’t think you know how to be better, Osamu.”

The door closed behind you, and for a moment, the world outside felt just as suffocating as the apartment you had left. Inside, Dazai sank to the floor, his head in his hands, his chest heaving with the weight of everything he hadn’t said.

For once, there were no words, no excuses, no clever remarks to hide behind. Only the sharp, aching truth: you were gone, and he had only himself to blame.

The room smelled faintly of sugar and salt—the remnants of the snacks he had devoured earlier, his wrappers still littering the coffee table. The curtains were drawn, the world outside shut out as always, and RANPO lounged on the couch like he didn’t have a care in the world. You stood by the window, the cool glass pressed to your fingers, staring out at the city lights that stretched endlessly beyond the horizon.

This wasn’t what you had wanted. Not now. Not anymore.

“Ranpo,” you said, softly at first, and then louder when he didn’t respond. “Ranpo, we need to talk.”

He glanced up from the handheld game console in his lap, tilting his head with that casual, almost dismissive smile you had grown to dread. “What about?”

You crossed your arms, trying to steady your voice, trying to ignore the way he was already looking at you like you were overreacting. “About us. About how you keep promising you’ll take this seriously. That you’ll try. But nothing’s changed, has it?”

Sighing dramatically, Ranpo set the console aside. “Oh, come on. Not this again. I told you, didn’t I? I’ll work on it. I just need more time.”

“Time?” you repeated, the word sharp in your mouth. “How much more time, Ranpo? How much longer am I supposed to wait for you to care enough to do something, anything, for us?”

His brow furrowed, his lips curving into a slight pout as if he were offended. “You’re acting like I don’t care,” he said, shrugging. “But I do. I’m here, aren’t I? Doesn’t that count for something?”

You laughed bitterly, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. “Being here isn’t the same as showing up for me, Ranpo. You keep me at arm’s length, always distracted, always playing your games or solving your mysteries like they’re the only things that matter. You keep saying you’ll try, but you never actually do. It’s like I’m begging for scraps, and I can’t do it anymore.”

His expression wavered, his confident mask slipping for just a second before he replaced it with indifference. “You’re blowing this out of proportion. You know how I am. Relationships just… aren’t my thing. I thought you understood that.”

“That’s the problem,” you snapped, the tears spilling over now. “I do understand. I understand that I’ve been waiting for someone who’s never going to meet me halfway. I’ve been fighting for something that’s never going to change.”

Ranpo leaned forward, his voice softening. “You’re overthinking it. You always do. I’m fine with how things are—why can’t you be?”

“Because I’m not fine, Ranpo,” you said, your voice breaking. “I’m exhausted. I love you, but I feel like I’m the only one trying, the only one who wants more than this endless cycle of nothing. And I can’t keep breaking my own heart waiting for you to catch up.”

Grabbing your coat, your chest tightened as you heard him shift on the couch behind you. “Wait,” he said, his voice uncharacteristically low, uncertain. “You’re not serious. You’re not really leaving, are you?”

You hesitated, your hand trembling on the doorknob. “I don’t want to leave,” you whispered. “But you’ve left me no choice.”

The door clicked shut behind you, and the air outside felt sharp, cold, and biting. Inside, Ranpo stared at the spot where you had stood, his hands limp in his lap, his mind racing in ways it never had before.

He had solved countless puzzles, unraveled mysteries no one else could touch, but this—this loss, this empty space where you used to be—was a riddle he couldn’t solve. For once, his brilliance was useless. And for the first time in his life, he felt truly, utterly lost.

The faint sound of keys jangling outside the door stirred you from where you sat, curled up on the couch with your arms wrapped around yourself. The clock read 2:37 AM. You didn’t need to look to know it was him. The heavy stomp of boots, the rasp of his breathing—alive, but barely.

As the door swung open, CHUUYA stumbled inside, his coat hanging in tatters, blood splattered across his shirt. He was holding his side, though he tried to hide the wince as he stepped forward.

“Don’t,” you said, your voice low, strained. You didn’t even look at him, staring instead at the cold, untouched tea sitting on the table.

Chuuya froze mid-step, the smirk he’d been ready to give you fading into something softer, something more uncertain. “Babe—”

“You can’t keep doing this, Chuuya.” Your words were barely above a whisper, trembling with all the emotion you couldn’t hold in any longer as you stared at his side as blood spilled to the ground.

He flinched at the sound of your voice, his hand dropping from his side. “I’m fine,” he muttered, stepping closer. “It’s nothing. Just a scratch.”

“Just a scratch,” you repeated bitterly, your knuckles white as you clenched your fists. “Every time, it’s just a scratch. And one day, it won’t be. One day, someone’s going to walk through that door, but it won’t be you. It’ll be Mori or someone else from the Port Mafia, and they’ll tell me you’re gone.”

Feeling his jaw tighten, he didn’t speak. He couldn’t.

“I’ve waited up every night,” you continued, your voice breaking. “Every single night, wondering if this will be the time you don’t come back. I can’t do it anymore, Chuuya. I can’t keep loving someone who doesn’t love themselves enough to stay alive.”

The red-head moved closer, reaching for you, his gloves sticky with blood. “Don’t do this,” he said, his voice rough, desperate. “I’m here, aren’t I? I came back. I’ll always come back.”

You stood, stepping away from him. He stopped in his tracks, his hands falling to his sides. “And for how long?” you asked, tears streaming down your face. “How many more times do I have to patch you up? How many more times do I have to wonder if the next fight will be your last?”

He stared at you, his chest rising and falling as if he couldn’t catch his breath. He opened his mouth to say something, anything, but the words didn’t come. He didn’t know how to promise you something he couldn’t control.

You grabbed your bag, your heart breaking with every step toward the door. Chuuya reached out again, his fingers brushing against your wrist, but you pulled away. “I love you,” you whispered, your voice so quiet it was almost swallowed by the silence. “But I can’t keep doing this. I won’t.”

The door shut behind you, the sound reverberating through the apartment like a gunshot. Chuuya stood there, frozen, his hand still outstretched.

And then, slowly, he sank to his knees, his head bowing as he pressed his bloody hands to his face. The room felt colder without you in it, the silence deafening. He had faced death countless times, laughed in its face even, but nothing had ever hit him like this.

He sat there for hours, unmoving, his chest aching with a pain he couldn’t fight, couldn’t fix. You were gone. And this time, he couldn’t bring you back.

The apartment felt lifeless, weighed down by the hum of the overhead lamp. KUNIKIDA sat at his desk, rigid as always, his pen gliding over the pages of his notebook with the same precision he brought to every corner of his life. The faint scratch of ink against paper was the only sound, filling the chasm where your voice used to belong.

You lingered by the doorway, your shadow stretching into the room, unnoticed. The sight of him—the man who once looked at you as if you were the one constant in his world—cut deeper than any words could. His face was lit by the cold, clinical glow of the desk lamp, sharp lines of exhaustion etched beneath his glasses. You wondered if he even realized how distant he had become, how hollow his promises now sounded.

“Kunikida,” you said, softly at first, the word trembling on your tongue like a final plea.

He didn’t stop writing. “In a minute,” he replied, the words automatic, lifeless.

Your lips parted in a bitter smile. A minute. How many of those had passed? How many hours had you spent as a footnote in his grand designs, the love you’d once shared overshadowed by ideals scribbled in neat columns? “No,” you said, the word firmer this time, cutting through the quiet. “We need to talk.”

The pen paused mid-stroke, his brow furrowing as though your interruption was a disruption in his carefully crafted world. He turned to look at you, his sharp eyes dim with impatience. “Is this really the time for dramatics?”

His words stung more than they should have, but you bit back the tears threatening to rise. Instead, you stepped forward, forcing yourself to meet his gaze. “I’ve waited for you,” you said, each word heavy with a grief you could no longer swallow. “For months, for years. I’ve waited for you to let me in. To give me even a piece of yourself that isn’t already claimed by this—” you gestured to the notebook, the desk, the rigid structure of his life “—this endless pursuit of perfection.”

Kunikida’s jaw tightened, his hands curling into fists at his sides. “I’m building something. For us. Don’t you see that? What I’m doing matters. It’s not about—”

“It’s not about me,” you interrupted, your voice breaking. “I know. It never has been. You’ve spent so long chasing your ideals that you’ve forgotten the person standing right in front of you. I’ve begged for scraps, Kunikida. Scraps of your time, your attention, your love. And I can’t do it anymore.”

The air between you seemed to thicken, silence stretching taut like a string on the verge of snapping. His mouth opened, but for once, Kunikida Doppo—so eloquent, so composed—had no words.

“I needed you,” you said, stepping back toward the door. “Not the future you’re building. Not the man you think you’re supposed to be. Just you. And you couldn’t give me that.”

You turned before he could see the tears finally spill over, the door clicking shut behind you.

Kunikida remained frozen, staring at the empty space where you had stood. The notebook lay open before him, a half-finished list of tasks glaring up at him like an accusation. Slowly, his gaze dropped to his hands, ink smudged on his fingers, trembling slightly.

This was supposed to be temporary, he told himself. The long nights, the endless sacrifices—it was all for something greater, something noble. But what good were his ideals now? What use were his plans if they had driven you away?

He closed the notebook with a trembling hand, the echo of the shut cover resounding through the empty apartment. And for the first time, Kunikida felt as though his vision of the future had slipped irreparably from his grasp.

The casino lights always felt too bright, too harsh, masking the emptiness that lingered behind them. The man sat on the edge of the bed, his shoulders slumped, his head bowed as if the weight of the entire world pressed down on him. His hands twisted nervously in his lap, trembling faintly, though SIGMA tried to still them.

You stood by the window, staring out at the neon glow of the city beyond. The glass reflected your silhouette back at you—a hollow figure, worn down by the same conversation you’d tried to have too many times.

“Do you even hear me, Sigma?” you asked softly, your voice breaking the stillness.

“I do,” he replied immediately, too quickly, his voice thin and fragile. But he didn’t look at you. He never did, not when it mattered most.

You turned, your arms crossed tightly over your chest. “Then why?” The word came out sharper than you intended, slicing through the air between you. “Why do you keep pulling away? Why do I feel like I’m the only one trying?”

Sigma flinched, his head sinking lower. “I’m trying,” he muttered, though the words sounded empty even to him. “I am. I just… I don’t know how.”

The confession hung in the air, brittle and raw.

You sighed, the anger slipping into exhaustion, your voice softening. “I don’t need you to be perfect, Sigma. I never did. I just needed you to try. To meet me halfway. But every time I reach for you, it’s like you’re not even there.”

His hands stilled, his fingers curling tightly against his palms. “I want to,” he whispered, his voice cracking. “But I… I don’t know how to be the person you need. I don’t know how to be anything but this.” He gestured vaguely at himself, his expression filled with a quiet despair.

You stepped closer, your chest aching at the sight of him so small, so utterly lost. But it wasn’t enough. Your love wasn’t enough. “I’ve waited, Sigma,” you said, your voice trembling. “I’ve waited so long for you to meet me in this, to choose me the way I’ve chosen you. But I can’t keep waiting for someone who doesn’t even know if they can try.”

The tears pooling in his eyes didn’t fall, but you saw them, glinting faintly in the dim light. He finally looked up at you, his face pale, his lips parted as though he wanted to speak. But nothing came.

“I love you,” you whispered, the words shattering as they left your lips. “But love can’t fix what you won’t even fight for.”

You grabbed your bag, the silence between you suffocating. Sigma didn’t move, didn’t stop you. He only sat there, his hands gripping the edge of the bed, his breath shallow and uneven as the door clicked shut behind you.

And then the stillness consumed him.

Sigma let out a shuddering exhale, burying his face in his hands as the weight of it all crashed down on him. He wanted to chase after you, to say the words he could never seem to find, to promise he could be better. But deep down, he knew the truth.

He had always been too small for this world, and now, he was too small for your love too.

a/n: HERE ML!! it’s not as angst-y as my other works but i added more characters so maybe you’d feel good!! lmk if i did it wrong <3 lowkey in love with kunika’s part

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hidtired · 8 months ago

Text

Unfortunate Timing [Part 2]

(Daryl Dixon x Reader) Masterlist

Description: You found out your pregnant early into your relationship with Daryl Dixon. To make matters worse? The apocalypse happens a few days later! (not fully canon)

4.2k words

Warnings (Pregnancy, gore, abuse, violence, fluff, walking dead stuff, ect.)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 etc.

A single moment can change your life, change the world. Everything only seemed to get worse. The quarry was a group of survivors that had formed. You and the Dixons were outcasts, at least it felt like it. The girls seemed to see you in low regard being pregnant. The men were no better. They saw you as a burden. The feeling of people talking behind your back stressed you out. Being pregnant also didn’t help. You felt tired all the time, also being plagued with morning sickness. Which is a stupid name when it happens all day. Throwing up in a world were food is now limited also leaves you uneasy.

You also see that stress weighing on Daryl. It wasn’t long ago he struggled with the fact of having a kid. Now seemed even more terrifying. He was becoming short tempered, to his credit only snapping at you once but regretted the way he almost made you cry. “No! I won’t take a break I have to keep going out there for food! You’ve been throwing up half the shit I’ve already gotten for you!”

He didn’t mean for it to sound like your wrong for doing so, he knew you couldn’t help it. He saw the glassy film come to the corner of your eyes. His heart tugged. You were in your tent you shared, sat on the sleeping bag with your head shamefully down. “No, no. Come on…” he angled your face back up to met his. He sank to his knees in front of you. “I know you can’t help it. M’ just trying to say you need more. I just want to make sure you’re gettin enough.” You had asked him to stay because he was rarely around. He was out alone looking for food and you couldn’t help but see every time he came back a little more on edge. He was getting into his head to much out there.

He knows you’re having a hard time. With being pregnant at this moment in time how could you not. You had tried to talk to the mothers of the camp for advice on anything, they didn’t bat an eye to you. You had looked for support and were denied it. He saw that you were being treated like a Dixon. Something he was familiar with, and something Merle also understood. Merle became more chill around you. No more sexual comments or sexist remarks. Doesn’t mean he is any less better to be around. He treated you like a sister you thought. He still was an ass. Making mean comments or complaining about something you did. But he had become family.

Andrea was your biggest pain. She seemed like she had something to prove. She hated the traditional female roles that had been pushed onto the girls. You understood her disliking for Merle but she attached that to Daryl and you as well. She didn’t say outright mean things but subtle jabs. Week after week it was chipping at your demeanor.

So here you are now, you think almost 3 months pregnant. Seeing Daryl was the highlight of whenever he appeared. You sat in your tent with him getting ready for his 2 day hunting trip for a deer he knew was near by. He sighed feeling your eyes on him, “Yer breakin my heart with that look.” Your smiling face replacing your sulking one, “I’m just missing you already.” You stood up, “You should see something before you go.” He turned to you questioningly. You pulled your shirt up over your stomach and turned to the side, “I know I haven’t seen myself in a mirror for a while but, I think I’m showing?” You looked up from your little bump that you could see spotting the surprised face he was making. He gulped before talking, “Ya sure are…” he walked closer placing a hand to your tummy. You saw his teeth were clenched. He felt the weight of pressure crushing him,

“We are doing are best, that’s all I could ask from you.”

He left for his hunt a little less stressed. You also saw Merle off later into the day with the first group run to the city. “Hey do me a favor and don’t get yourself killed.” Merle turned to you, “And have those freaks naw on m' sweet ass?” You chuckle as you walk away, “Let’s just hope you remember your ass from your elbow!”

The day progress like any other. It had just become the afternoon when the sound of the radio chirped on. It cause some disagreement about making a sign to warn others about the city. You just went back to minding your own business. You helped boil water taking notice of Lori trimming her son’s hair. You spoke up noticing the displeased look on Carl's face, “Going for a mohawk Carl? Or maybe you’re thinking bald.” His nose scrunched up at the thought. You laugh at the reaction, “Bald people run faster.” Carl smiled, “Nuh-uh!” You shook your head and shrugged, “How do you know if you won’t try.” He looked to his mom, “I’d rather have hair than be faster!” He said it to his mom like he tried convincing her to not make him bald. Lori smiled at her son, “Ya me to, but if you keep moving you might be bald at the end of this.” He straightened and stilled, but he still spoke, “I hate haircuts…”

Shane came and sat down looking at you briefly. “One of these days you’ll be missing your mother’s hair cuts.” Carl rolled his eyes, "I'd like to see that day!" It had initially shocked you that Shane wasn’t Carl's dad. You always assumed for how close they were and how often they would walk into the woods together. Then it put a gross feeling into your mouth that his father had only recently died. Shane was his apparent best friend and coworker. But it wasn’t necessarily wrong, you just didn’t like to think about it often.

After finishing with boiling water you handed it to Carol. You felt sweaty and all around unpleasant. You needed a nap. You said to Carol that you were going to lay down if they needed to find you. You woke up to arguing. The group that went out had radioed saying there was a problem. Everyone was scared for their respective family that had gone to the city. You felt a pit form in your stomach. The hormones in your body already swarming causing you to be unable to control them. You picture what happened to your Aunt in front of you. Sometimes it still feels as if the blood was still on your face. The thought of knowing she was one of those things walking around somewhere. Maybe they all were already dead like her. You weren’t exactly thrilled about Merle as a person but, you knew deep down he was another person to help protect your baby.

You decided there was no use in stressing yourself, so you went and distracting yourself with chores. Laundry, moving fire wood to our fire pit, took a walk near the perimeter, which now leaves you here at the waters edge. You used the cool water to help with the swelling in your feet and ankles. Week after week you had the sense that being pregnant is going to really suck farther down the road. You fiddle with your knife while swaying your feet in the water. Lost in your own world when an echo starts to ring out throughout the quarry.

The car alarm got louder so you slipped your shoes on and walked back up to the camp. You saw a red car and Glenn standing outside of it. Shane opening the hood and pulling something to stop its beeping. People were yelling at him for answers when a van appeared, ‘so everyone made it back.’ It was a relief to stop the constant thought of the worse. You couldn’t help but notice Merle nowhere to be seen. But that thought was pushed aside when you heard Carl scream,

“DAD!”

You watched with a smile at the reunion of the Grimes family. Also taking notice of Shane making a weird face. He probably was feeling sick to his stomach and you thought it kinda deserved. He did persuade his grieving wife. The thought was interrupted by T-dog coming toward you with a concerned face. You clicked something was wrong, then started to look around. Merle was still no where. The sinking feeling of realization hit you. T-dog watch as understanding washed over you. A hand over your mouth, “W-where is Merle?” A few others turning at the mention, Lori’s husband taking the most notice. T-dog spoke first, “He was putting all of us in danger. He was cracked out of his mind.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, ‘I told him to behave.’ You inhale trying to calm yourself, “He dead?” T-dog shook his head. You nodded looking at all the pears of eyes on you. Your eyes were shiny but nothing fell. You huffed and walked back to your tent. While you were upset about Merle being gone it wasn’t about that. It proved how fucked this new world was becoming. A world your child would have to be in. Suddenly being pregnant with them seemed like the safest place for them. Your thoughts of how it would suck later in pregnancy and 'couldn’t wait for it to be over' stopped. Your child is the safest it will ever be in its life. That terrifying thought scared you.

It wasn’t until later when the sun began to set that you had calmed. It was cold and you wanted to sit by a fire. People were surprised when you appeared and sat with them. You had over heard parts about what happened to Rick. But at the sight of you got them talking about Merle. It was Dale who brought it up, “Who is going to tell Daryl Dixon about his brother?” Rick glanced to you then back to Dale, “I will. I’m the one who handcuffed him.” Then T-dog shook his head, “Nah I dropped the key, makes this one mine.” Based on that information you started to piece what happened on the run. That thought stalled to a stop when Glenn stated, “Not to make it about race but maybe a white guy should tell him?” Is that what they thought about Daryl? They just assuming he is like his brother? You huff in anger, “Really Glenn? He is not racist. He’s only the person that, you know, been feeding all of you.” Glenn turned sheepish at your harsh tone. You stood, “But you know, leave his brother for dead seems like a good trade for how much he has been doing for all of you people!”

You visible deflate mood switching on a dime. You move a hand to your small bump, “Sorry I know you probably had a good reason, Merle is a hard ass.” You sunk back down enjoying the fire too much to go to bed. Rick’s voice spoke calmly, “Your pregnant.” He stated it more as a realization. You look to his shocked face, clearly thinking of how unlucky a timing it was to be. You chuckled speaking sarcastically, “Keep up with those observations and you’re sure to make detective.” His eyebrows drawn in by thought, “Merle was the father?” Disgust washing over your face, “Ew. God I take it back.” Everyone was surprised at your blatant dislike for Merle. They knew Daryl was the dad. You start to clarify, “Daryl is the dad.” You took notice of there original reaction, “Look I don’t like Merle anymore then you probably do. Half the time I don’t think Daryl does either! But he is still at the end of the day my family now.”

Peoples lack of trying to talk to you has put there own version of you in there head. They thought you were quiet and jumpy. Questioning if they did talk to you they would do more harm then good like with Carol. Now the few talks they’ve had or heard from you made sense. You were out spoken and just tired from being pregnant. You stood up again feeling awkward. “I’m going to bed, figure out what to say to Daryl. Maybe watch out for a punch or two.” So you walked off to bed. You were happy you could see Daryl in the morning, but the thought of him learning of his brother broke your heart. You tossed and turned most of the night with the thought.

The light shining through your tent lead you awake. Still trying to cling to as much sleep while feeling drowsy. Then you heard Carl and Sophia screams. You sat up and tried to get to your feet causing a wave of dizziness. The shuffling of stomping feet telling you people were running over there. You slip on shoes taking a moment to become alright with gravity again. Amy and Andrea walked away when you walked over a voice caught your attention, “Its gotta be the brain, don’t youall know nothing?” You smiled glad Daryl is back. When you turn the corner however you weren’t expecting a walker and deer to be sprawled out dead on the floor. You made eye contact with Daryl when the smell of the walker pulled a gag from you. The smile being wiped from your face as a hand comes to your mouth. You immediately turned back around and walked away.

Daryl was well aware of how sensitive your senses have become. You can’t handle anything raw at the moment. He noticed a week into the quarry how you would look at something raw, something that never bother you before, and it would make you queasy. Speaking of raw he should probably get the squirrels ready. He sighed watching you walk away with a love sick hopelessness washed on his face. Something that people have never taken notice of before. So he called for his brother to help, so he could get to you sooner. That's when all hell broke loose.

You heard the calls for Merle hearing Daryl walk back. Then you saw all the guys surround him. Then you watched him pace back and forth. You knew that was a coping thing he did so you decided to stand closer. By the time you had walked over he threw the squirrels he’d caught at Rick. You didn’t even have a moment to yell his name when the former policemen jumped him and pinned him. Shane putting him in a headlock and Rick getting in his face. You yelled in displeasure,

“Get the hell off him!”

It was the loudest anyone has heard you, also the angriest. Shane had glanced to you before releasing his hold on him. Daryl sprung back up frustration clear on his face. When he turned to make sure you were behind him you caught a glimpse of his eyes becoming glassy. T-dog chimed in from the earlier conversation you didn’t hear, “It’s not his fault, I dropped the key.” Daryl’s voice strained, “You couldn’t pick it up?!” T-dog looked down guilty, "Well, I dropped it into a drain. But before I left I chained the door shut." Daryl shook his head and started to back up, "That supposed to make me feel better! Hell with all of y'all, just tell me where he is so I can go an get him." You hated to see him upset. You weren't expecting Lori to pipe in and volunteering her husband to take Daryl there. Rick said he was planning to go back anyways saying it was wrong for anything to suffer like that. Shane being the typical hard ass and self employed leader strongly disagreed. With a few others joining it was decided, they were going to get Merle back.

You were finally alone with Daryl again. He still seemed riled over everything but also you could see he was getting emotional. He was turned around facing away from you. You slowly wrapped you arms around him, holding him from behind. He slowly turned into you resting his chin on your head and arms going over your shoulders. You felt him release air, sinking into you. He try's to hide it but you see he is exhausted. You saw he felt like he had to prove something to you, or maybe just to himself. He released you with avoided eye contact. He took a moment with you and collected himself but, he was still a man on a mission.

You watch as Daryl throw things into a bag and refusing to met your eye to avoid whatever look that would break his heart. They were about to take off back to the city and into danger, so you stopped Daryl by putting your hands to his chest. He spoke before you could, "Look I have ta go get him, I know you don't want me goin-" You cut him of by grabbing his face, "When you see him again you tell him I warned his dumb ass, and when you get him back here I'm going to chew him out for this!" He looked at you stunned. You use your grip on his face to drag him into a kiss, "And you better comeback here without a scratch!" He smiled at you, eyes soft, he kissed you again.

"Yes Ma'am."

They had left hours ago and you had that uneasy feeling again. You respected Rick more then anyone else at the camp and he just got here. He was a decent guy but feel bad watching Carl's worried expression. Lori even flipped that he was going right after she herself said he was. Mood swings on that girl, and your the one whos supposed to be pregnant. Jim was off digging which concerned a few. It led to him tided to a tree for his own safety. Granted it was the only eventful thing that would probably happen today. Unless a swamp monster dragged itself out of the water you and all the girls were doing laundry in. Although Ed was a close to one. It was a welcome distraction all the same. To have girl talk again was essential to any girl and none can say other wise. Most of the girls seemed like they could now talk to you and it was a relief.

Although Andrea kinda still sucks the life out of fun, "So how did you end up pregnant?" Most girls look over to her wet laundry in hand and displeased looks by the question. You tightly rung a shirt and looked at her in the eye, "Well, I think your a little old for the birds and bees talk." That gained an eye roll from her but chuckles from the others. You smiled before giving her the answer you are sure she was trying to dig for, "I found out a day before the fall." The thought making you think of your Aunt. You continued on anyways, "Daryl and I hadn't been dating that long I'll be honest, so it wasn't exactly planned. Then I thought it was the end of the world." You look around to the thoughtful faces around you and shrugged, "Turns out I was a day off on that though." It was lighthearted from there, mentions of things that they missed from before. Carols unexpected and less then innocent choice sent waves of laughter throughout the lady's. That fun was crushed by the swamp monster known as Ed.

It lead to something you didn't expect. His sexism rubbing everyone the wrong way. Making Andrea questioned what he did instead of sitting on his ass doing nothing. Which while true and agreed with it lead to him to try to take Carol away and most likely go hit her. When Andrea challenge Ed in doing so it left a sinking feeling in you. You were uncomfortable with confrontation, probably do with the way your parents had treated you. Even with the sinking feeling you try and pull Carol behind you. The exaltation of his action were unpredictable, "Think I won't hit some pregnant whore?!" That was the first swing. It almost fully landed grazing your cheek. Carol had used the arm you had on her to tug you back before he swung. The frightened yelps and yells grabbing the attention from those farther. Carol now stood slightly in front of you, your cold damp hand moving to your warmed cheek he clipped. Ed now focused on his wife slapping her and trying to drag her away but the other girls now stepping in and clung to her. You didn't even see Shane before he pulled Ed backwards and began to lay punch after punch into him. Everyone but Carol were stunned into silence. Carols cry's and the grunts coming from the men filled the air. So maybe Jim wasn't the only thing that was going to happen today.

Everything was tense after that. With the amount things gone wrong and the still missing members that went to the city, moral was low among the group. Later in the evening Amy and Andrea had gone fishing catching dinner. The sun drifted closer to fully set as the fish was cooked with one question still in there minds, 'Where were they?' The smell of the fish left you gagging and need for fresher air. You found you way back to the water to dip your swollen feet in the water again. It wasn't a unusual thing you did, you did it often. Knife in hand and legs swaying in the cool water. The light dissipated making you aware you should get back soon. You had heard laughs by the camp so moral was rising from the stressful day. You used your cold hands to press to your reddened face from almost getting flattened out by Ed. Daryl would will not be happy about that. You had pulled you feet from the water shaking the water off them to put your shoes on. Then the day got even worse. A scream ripped threw the air making you turn to the sound. You see outlines of figures in the dark. You feel fear crash into you.

'Walkers...'

There were even two coming closer to you from the woods to the side of the water. They had almost snuck up on you if you hadn't looked around because of the scream. A tremble was in your hand as you gripped the knife you had. You slowly back away, hearing gunshots off in the air. Daryl had taught you this for this moment. He had grilled this into you in fear that maybe he wouldn't be around to protect you. The first walker was a thin women, the other a male missing its arm and limping. You lunged the knife into the women's eye. Your knife breaking by the blade as the women fell over dead. The snapping of the metal was like slow motion, the other walker steps away from you. You step back bare feet getting hurt by the jagged rocks. You had looked down spotting a larger rock and hurriedly pick it up.

You remember the motions Daryl had showed you for self defense but had never practiced them with him. He didn't really like the idea of rough housing with his pregnant girlfriend even if it was for your defense. You reached and tugged the one arm the walker had and tripped the thing in the motion. It was flat on the floor about to get back up and grab at you. However, rock in hand you threw downward blows one after another even after the thing stopped moving. Blood splatting all over you shirt and down your arms. The buzz of adrenalin causing your hands to violently shake when you stopped swinging. The urge to cry was strong but you notice the now slue of gunshots that had increased stop. The silence broken by the yell and worried cry for your name.

"Y/N!!!"

Your body fluttered at the sound of Daryl. Still bare foot you ran up the gravel hill and yelling back to him with emotion in your voice, "DARYL!!!" You had made it to the top getting to see him wipe around to your voice. His crossbow dropped to the ground as you both booked it toward each other. He didn't know what to think when he couldn't find you after the last walker fell. The inability to find you cracking a desperate hole into his chest. When he heard you and saw you running to him relief flooded him. As he ran panic rose again seeing you dripping in blood. Inches apart he heard your desperate sobs before crashing into one another. He pulled you off your feet lifting you into him. His voiced stuttered out, "Are you bit?! Are you ok?!" You voice quivering as you sucked in a breath. "I'm alright-t." He felt you shaking like a leaf and whispered into you, "I've got ya, nothin is gonna hurt ya." You had barred your face into his neck now crying in relief. Daryl helped you get cleaned up, that night you clung to him while everyone 'slept'. A moment can change everything, and it was clear to everyone after today.

They were no longer safe here and things were only going to get worse.

Part 3

Feedback welcome and requests open!

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forzalando · 6 months ago

Text

what if?

unrequited love, best friend!lando blurb request from @foreveralbon! liyah gave me the choice of which side the unrequited love came from and unfortunately, i chose to break lando’s heart. please forgive me. i tried to find a pic where he looked a little sad but i don't want him sad so i strayed completely from the vibe of this blurb. also yes, if anyone was wondering, i named the male oc aaron because of aaron hotchner. can't tell if i love or hate this so go easy on me lol pairing: fem!reader x best friend!lando (platonic), fem!reader x oc male word count: 2.1k summary: it’s finally time for your friends to meet someone special. you’re in love with him, and lando has to come to terms with that. tw: unrequited love, heartbroken lando

Your phone buzzed from across the room, a familiar ringtone echoing through the air letting you know that Lando was finally returning your call.

“I sincerely hope you haven’t been avoiding me because you’re planning on ditching my dinner party tonight,” you scolded as soon as you picked up the phone.

“I would never,” Lando gasped. “I was on the sim and had my phone on silent – do you need me to bring anything? How many people will be there?”'

“Oh, not too many at all, I’ve got everything I need. I asked Max, Pietra, Carlos, Rebecca, Charles, and Alex. Oh, and Maxie is coming and bringing someone, can you believe it? I’m so glad he’s finally moving on from Kelly. Oscar and Lily can’t make it – he’s got a family thing, but he promised a double lunch ‘date’ when they’re back in Monaco next week.”

“Geez, why are all of our friends in loving relationships or dating except us, huh? Look at us, the old spinsters!”

You didn’t miss the sadness in his voice even though he tried to mask it with a joke, which made your next admission even harder than you thought it would be.

“Actually, I have someone I want you to meet,” you said quietly. “His name is Aaron and he’ll be here tonight.”

“Really?” Lando coughed, hoping to mask the sound of himself choking on air. “It must be pretty serious for you if he’s meeting all of us – how, um, how long? Have you been seeing him?”

You knew he’d ask and you didn’t want to answer, afraid that he would be upset you’ve kept this from him for so long. You’ve always shared everything with him for the past five years, but for a few subjectively good reasons, you’d kept this a secret until now.

“Please don’t be mad,” you mumbled. “I’ve been seeing him for about seven months but I wasn’t hiding it on purpose or anything, I swear, I just didn’t want to ask you to prioritize meeting my boyfriend during the season. It was too soon to introduce you over summer break, now was just the best time.”

You heard Lando exhale on the other end of the line – whether it was a sigh of annoyance, relief, or anger, you couldn’t tell.

“I get it, don’t worry,” he forced out. “I know I’m never around. I’m excited to meet him, I’ll see you in a bit, yeah?”

Before you could say anything else, Lando ended the call.

Lando hadn’t taken his eyes off of you the entire evening – introductions had gone perfectly, all of your friends seemed to love Aaron, conversation was flowing smoothly, but it was painfully obvious, at least to you, that something was up with Lando.

You’d barely gotten through dessert when the onslaught of relationship questions started coming your way – mainly from Charles, if you can believe it. Aaron had started on cleaning up the kitchen and Charles didn’t hesitate to bombard you as soon as Aaron had left the room.

“So, how did you guys meet? How did he ask you out? Tell me everything.”

“Charles!” Alex scolded. “Don’t interrogate her, she’ll tell us if she’s ready!”

You smiled in thanks at Alex, although you knew she was just as eager to hear you tell the tale.

“Actually, I have Lando to thank,” you smiled at Lando, turning your attention towards him for a brief moment. “The day we met, I was supposed to be having lunch with him but he got caught up in a meeting and was running way late. Aaron saw me sitting alone and thought I’d been stood up, introduced himself, and then gave me this cheesy line about how someone was missing out on a date with the most beautiful woman in the world.”

Rebecca sighed and fixed her gaze on Carlos – “why aren’t you that romantic?”

“I’m perfectly romantic,” Carlos countered. “Remember when I – ”

Pietra interrupted and shushed him abruptly, “Y/N isn’t done talking, you can defend yourself later.”

“Anyway,” you laughed, “I told him that I was waiting for my best friend and he offered to buy me a drink while I waited, but Lando had texted about five minutes before that he was on his way. So, I turned him down, but he left a note with the hostess and asked her to give it to me when I was on my way out. It was just the next day’s date, a time, and the name of a wine bar nearby signed with his name. I showed up and the rest is history, he charmed me.”

“I didn’t know it was Lando you were waiting on,” Aaron chimed in, walking into the dining room. He stopped next to Lando’s chair, holding his hand out for a handshake. “As a lifelong McLaren fan, I never thought I’d be thanking Lando Norris for arriving late, but thank you. You changed my life that day.”

Lando slowly shook his hand and with gritted teeth responded, “Yeah, man, no problem. Glad I could help, seriously.”

From the looks on everyone’s faces, it was now clear to you that you weren’t the only one who noticed something was wrong with Lando.

He’d barely said a word all evening, and from the tone of his voice, it definitely was a problem and he was not glad he could help.

“It’s a little stuffy in here, I’m going to get some air,” you announced, rising quickly from your chair. “Lando, come with me? Aaron, I’ll finish up in the kitchen later, why don’t the rest of you get comfortable in the living room?”

Begrudgingly, Lando followed you out to your patio. It was surprisingly chilly for mid-December and the sudden gust of wind that pulled a shiver from you wasn’t helping at all. You had barely stopped shivering when you felt Lando’s jacket drape across you, his hands smoothing the shoulders down before he took his place next to you against the balcony.

“There he is,” you crooned. “My kind and considerate best friend.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

You turned your head to face him rather than look at the view, your eyebrows furrowing together and a sick feeling creeping into your stomach.

“Do you not like Aaron?” You asked quietly, the frown on your face deepening. “Everyone else seems to love him, did he say something to you? You were a little…off just now, are you mad he’s a McLaren fan? I promise you, he is not dating me to get to you or any other crazy idea you may have concocted. He didn’t even know we were friends for the first three months.”

Lando didn’t answer you, his eyes still trained on the Mediterranean Sea in the distance. He was picking at his fingernails – something he only did when he was anxious or upset.

“Please say something,” you pleaded. “I, gosh I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I'm in love with him, Lando. If you have reservations or concerns, please be honest with me. Your opinion means a lot to me, more than I thought it would.”

The silence was deafening – still no response for what felt like ages, the sick feeling in your stomach growing more prominent with every passing second.

“You love him?” Lando finally spoke, looking down, out, away – anywhere but at your face.

“Yes, I do. Like, a scary amount. I’m terrified, actually, but in the best way. I never thought I’d find love like this, Lan.”

“Well, that’s a problem, isn’t it?” Lando laughed, a humorless laugh, and backed away from the railing to sit on one of your deck chairs – his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

Before you could voice your confusion, he looked up at you, a sadness in his eyes you’d never seen before.

“He’s annoyingly wonderful and perfect for you, Y/N,” he began. “As soon as I walked in tonight, I knew. He barely let you lift a finger, remembered facts about everyone in there and was sincerely happy to get to know everyone. He gravitates towards you, smiles whenever you speak, always wants to be near you, and holds you like you’re the most precious thing in the world to him. He treats you how I would treat you if I were lucky enough to be in his shoes. And the way he looks at you? I know that look,” he paused, closing his eyes tightly. “It’s the way I look at you.”

The sick feeling in your stomach turned to dread and you felt your heart squeezing in your chest, a mix of a gasp and a sob climbing out of your throat.

“Lando, I – ”

“It’s ok,” he smiled, staring directly at you with watery eyes. “I love you. I know it’s one-sided, and that’s ok. I promise you, it’s okay. I just needed you to know, and not because I thought it would change your feelings for him or to confuse you, you just deserve to know. I’ve kept it from you for far too long and I wish this wasn't how or why I finally told you.”

Tears spilled from your eyes, your hand shaking as you reached for Lando’s, gripping it so tight you thought you might leave a bruise.

“I’m sorry, Lando,” you cried. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know, I – I never would have made you come or said those things if I had known.”

Guilt crawled its way into the mix of emotions swirling inside you. Some of your friends and family members had alluded to his feelings for you over the years, but you always ignored them, insisting that you were just friends, best friends, but you secretly sometimes felt that there may be some truth in it. You wished more than anything in that moment that you had taken that feeling more seriously.

“I didn’t want you to know, it’s my fault you didn’t know,” Lando insisted. “You have nothing to apologize for.”

“If you need some time, some distance, I can respect that,” you offered, though the thought of Lando agreeing to that was unbearably painful.

“No, no, I’ll be ok. It’ll take some time for me to move on but I’d rather deal with the pain of being close to you while I get over you than not have you in my life for however long it takes. All that matters to me is that you’re happy, and if Aaron makes you happy, I can live with that.”

Selfishly, you sighed in relief, squeezing the hand you were holding before pulling away from him. Your friendship would feel different for a while, but you could manage different; you could manage anything as long as Lando remained a fixture in your life.

“I think I’m going to go,” he whispered, rising from the chair and sliding his hands into his pockets. “I’ve made things awkward enough for one evening, don’t you think?”

You started to assure him he did no such thing, but when you saw the smirk on his face you knew he’d said it to try to relieve the heaviness that had settled over you. You handed him back his jacket, smoothing the shoulders down once he’d put it on just as he did for you earlier. Small, tentative smiles graced both of your faces before you pulled him into a gentle hug, hesitating just enough to allow him to back away if it was too much for him.

He squeezed you once tightly and then let go – the quickness of it expected, but the fact he accepted it at all gave you hope that everything would be ok.

You watched him as he reached for the door handle to go inside, but he paused and turned around just before he grabbed hold.

“Would it have made a difference? If I had told you before you met him?”

You weren’t sure which answer would hurt him more, but you were always honest with him and that wasn’t going to change now.

“No, Lando, it wouldn't have. I do love you, I always have and always will, but I'm not in love with you. I've never thought of you in that way, I'm sorry.”

He nodded once, accepting your answer, and then he was gone. You were being truthful, and Lando knew without a doubt that you were, but he also knew in his heart and soul that you would always and forever be his biggest “what if?”.

-----------

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#lando norris x reader #lando norris angst #lando norris #f1 x reader #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #formula one #formula 1 fanfic #ln4 #forzalando 3k

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toomiieimagiines · 3 months ago

Note

hihihi

uhm so am i allowed to request again (i don’t wanna spam) 😭😭🙏

and if i am can u pls do a rui x hopeless romantic best friend reader (i’m totally normal about best friends to lovers lmfao)

so like the reader is always yapping about hot guys and it’s a little angsty at first because rui is thinking to himself ‘why did i have to fall inlove with someone that won’t ever choose me’ and then one day a hot guy comes up to reader and asks her out, reader is about to say yes but then she realises that she barely knew him and there was someone (rui) who had been by her side since day one and she figures out who she really loves (RUIII) so she rejects him and when rui asks why she just hugs him and says ‘because your the one i really want’ mwah mwah i feel like such a genius (i really hope this made sense lmao be prepared for a million bestie-> lovers and angst-> fluff rui requests 😼)

thank youyoyoyoyoyuuu!!

hi guys! i’m so so incredibly sorry for how inactive i have been! unfortunately, the fanfic writer curse caught up to me, and i’ve had considerably bad things happen to me! ToT

i had developed a really bad addiction after a recent episode - which may be why i’ve loved to write my characters so miserable, but they get a happy ending in the end - and have recently relapsed after a couple months. i’ve also been struggling with a lot of things, like being bullied again, pressure from theater, classes, autism, parental issues, memory of past trauma, having no friends, things like that. i’ve just been having a really hard time, so writing has been super difficult for me. i’m currently having some of the worst mental health in my life, and am un-recovering from other things i’ve had in the past too, after seeing the results of my recovery. sorry if this triggered anybody, i just needed to get this off my chest, and felt also that i should explain where i have been. you all supporting me has kept me going, and i hope you enjoy this one too! LETS END THE PITY PARTY!!!

in other - not so depressing news - here you guys go!! sorry for OOCness, obviously this is a more dramatic approach to a story! happy ending, j tried to write the inner narration differently for how you two were feeling at the time.. and ty once again for such a great idea, mama ^3^

“I don’t think I could stand to be where you don’t see me.”

If he has to sit here and listen to this one more time, he thinks he’ll go insane.

Rui Kamishiro loves you. He truly does. You’re his best friend, his partner in crime, his-

Never mind.

Rui loves you, but he absolutely HATES your taste in guys, and it’s driving him nuts. Nodding and agreeing can only get him so far before he wants to rip his own hair out, and tonight is no exception.

“I give up! All boys are dumb, I don’t need them!” You lament, resting your chin in your hands. It’s the same song and dance over and over. You swear off boys, you get attention, you get sucked in, and he has to pick up the pieces when it inevitably fails. How many times has he thought about how much better he would treat you now? He doesn’t know. He’d be a classical lover, he’d never speak to you the way those stupid unprincipled high school boys do.

Gross. That’s his best friend, why’d he think that? And when did he start being so self confident? He really outta look at himself in the mirror. What an egomaniac he’s turning out to be.

He shakes his head.

“You do know I’m still a boy, right?” He prods, trying to cheer you up. He knows this situation well, and he knows exactly how to make you feel better. Again he’d pull you out of this, and again he’d watch you fall in love.

He wishes you could be happy. He wishes you weren’t in love with being in love. You’re too pure for true love, love is disgusting, depraved, and unkind. You’re not anything like that.

“I know, I know, but you’re the only good one!” You point, words self-assured. “I don’t need a boyfriend, you do everything boyfriendy for me anyway!”

Ouch. Thanks a lot, that’s exactly what he needed to hear right now. He’s not gonna dwell on that last bit for now, he’ll wait until he’s home. Then he can- he doesn’t know. Cry, or something juvenile like that.

“So I’m back-up-boyfriend?” He masks himself in jest, smiling teasingly at you.

“Eh, maybe,” you snicker, “you’d definitely be cute if you weren’t my friend.”

He turns to his school work sharply, trying to mask his complete and utter despair. Ugh, why does he have to be so dramatic? His own personality makes his skin crawl with disgust and hatred, and that only makes him cringe more. He could think about how obnoxious he is all day. Maybe he should use that go home and cry pass early. He pretends to check the time, as if that isn’t all he’s been doing.

“It’s getting late, after this problem I should get going.” He mutters, scribbling some random numbers into his notebook. You yawn in response, being broken out of absentmindedly scrolling through your phone.

“Ugh, I wish you didn’t have to go!” You drape an arm over his torso, trying to hold him in. He smiles fondly, wrestling to get you off of him.

“I’d have to walk home in the dark then, do you want that?” He knows you’d never let him, and he sees it immediately.

Your face looks knowing, and you let him go right away. It amuses him at first, but quickly fills him with overwhelming pity. You’re so kindhearted it makes him sick. You shouldn’t worry about someone like him, it’s bad for your health.

“Would you like me to walk home with you?!” You shoot up, the idea of him not being safe running through your head. Maybe he should’ve kept his mouth shut. How emasculating! He’s not a helpless young girl! He’s just as manly as those boys who you long for, he’s not a puppy to be walked!

God, is jealously turning him into a bigot? He shakes his head once again, this time not just to clear his thoughts. He’s absolutely not letting you walk him home, it’d be mortifying. He takes your attention belly up, you should have a break. Maybe some time to yourself for a change? God, Rui, get a grip.

“I’m fine, I don’t want you out late by yourself either,” he assures, looking at you in haste.

“Ah. You have a point.”

“I always do.” He means more to that, and he wishes he could tell you. He wants you to see that even he knows what he’s talking about. He needs you to see him, just for once. Not as a best friend, or backup boyfriend, just as a regular one. As a lover who dances in the rain, or ties your shoes

He needs to stop. He shouldn’t think about you like that. It’s lecherous.

You two exchange goodbyes, giving him a long hug (much to his horror). He hates how feverish it is it hold you like this, it makes him feel guilty. His body gets hot, his cheeks flare up, his throat feels tight- it makes him feel like a pervert, even if his thoughts are the farthest thing from lewd.

He feels that everything he thinks about you is repulsive, though.

“Be safe”’s and “See you later”’s are passed between you two, and he walks down your front steps, now completely alone. His eyes scan the damp pavement, seeing the golden hues from the sky light the boring rock. That’s how he feels about you, he decides. You’re the sun, and he’s the pavement. He humors himself by thinking that your suitors are the clouds, stopping you from shining your light for him so he can grow weeds in the cracks of his soul. That’s what these feelings are. Weeds.

He wants to live life beautifully with you, he decides. He wants to tie your shoes, he wants to twirl you as you dance.

He wishes he could be the moon. Something of consequence- of importance, but he’s just the pavement. Not the earth, not the stars, not the clouds, or rain, he’s just a man made monster who destroys nature - you - and is walked over by people who do matter.

He should quit being this way, he grumbles, it doesn’t do anybody any good to be so flowery. He’s too girly- too weak. Maybe that’s why you don’t like him. If you’re willing to date anything that moves other than him, that must mean he’s on a completely new level, huh?

That’s what dreaming gets you, Rui. Crushed dreams and embarrassment.

He lets out a pitiful sigh, kicking a pebble with his shoe. He sees a worm in a lawn which reminds him of himself, he sees a couple shopping for a new game which reminds him of you, he sees a convenience store which reminds him that he’s hungry-

His life can be so mundane sometimes, what a drag.

He’s about to reach his front door, when he steps into a puddle. It feels like an appropriate representation of his life right now. A sense of disgraceful hilarity washes over him, and he begins to laugh. He laughs a while, he laughs as he takes his shoes off, he laughs as he peels his button up down, and he laughs as he lays in his bed. How dramatic he could be some times!

He falls asleep quickly. He has a dream about being on stage and forgetting his lines.

He wakes up with a thud, he fell out of bed. How embarrassing. He decides to check his phone.

Weirdo: RUII

Weirdo: wanna hang w me 2day?? u don’t have dance time right??

Weirdo: gonna kill you. WAKE UP

Me: I’m awake, sorry!

Weirdo: finally sleeping beauty

Weirdo: wanna get a snack? i’m simply starved…

Me: When?

Weirdo: an hr maybe…

Me: Okay :) I’ll tell you when I leave.

Weirdo: kay!!

He really doesn’t feel like being social today, but he’d never pass up an opportunity to see you. He’s an obscene degenerate when it comes to you, pouncing on your attention like a sick dog. It’s mortifyingly pathetic.

He gets dressed, throwing on a boring striped sweater. It’s getting colder outside recently, and he’s always ran cold anyway. His hands are shaky and nervous as he brushes his teeth, the anxiousness to see you making his body jittery. He considers breakfast, but quickly shuts the idea down. He doesn’t want to be stressed out - at least more than he already is - when he sees you. Twitchy hands lock his door, and he gets a few feet away before he double checks that he did, in fact, lock it. Pull yourself together, Rui! He screams at himself.

The walk is just as unexciting as he expected, albeit a bit chilly. He’s feeling thankful for the sweater. The breeze runs its hands through his hair, and he’s reminded that winter is coming. He always liked Autumn flowers the best, hibiscus flowers are pretty too, he supposes. It’s nice to have the warmth of the sun soothing his cold hands during summer, for sure.

He trips over a rock on the way, and his pants get wet on the knees. Khaki blends into an ugly brown, and he sighs. How unlucky, would anything go right for him today?

Turns out it will, you look really good today.

You great him at the door, practically buzzing with eagerness. It makes him smile, knowing that you do, in fact, want to see him. Or at least are acting like it. You’re a good friend to him, he’s lucky to have you.

“Rui!” You hug him as a greeting, wrapping your arms tightly around his waist. His heart soothes, eyes closing in relaxation. Problems feel obscure and distant when you two are like this, despite his reluctance last night. He can forget about corrupt feelings - or misguided love- and he can just be your best friend. Despite his apprehension to be cared for, he is flattered that you, at least, seem to like him.

“Hey.” He breaths you in, his voice soft. He hopes you don’t notice, it’s embarrassing.

“Hey!” You reply, pulling away. “Big things planned, Rui!”

“What big things?” He asks, amused. “Big things” for you were junk food and shopping.

“Big things! It’s a surprise!” You put your shoes on, and he can’t help but feel jealous as he watches your hands tie them dutifully. He sighs, stretching. He decides to make it a challenge to act normal the whole day. No weird thoughts are going to beguile his mind, he promises himself.

You lock your front door, twisting the knob to make sure that it did, in fact, lock. This fills him with a child-like sense of delight, maybe you two really were similar.

Nah, not possible. You’re too pure - too perfect. Ugh, Rui, no more stupid thoughts.

He watches you check the time, make a face at a nearby bird, and cover your cheeks with your hands. You suddenly perk up, wrapping your arms around him.

“Warm me up, will ya?” You scowl at the cool air, grip tightening. He gulps. It’s weird he reacts like this, considering you two have done things like this all the time. It’s normal, so why does he have to be such a creep? His arms wrap around yours, running his hands up and down to create heat.

“Should’ve worn a jacket,” he chides, “wouldn’t be cold, y’know?” His voice is so casual, like everything is totally fine. It is fine. Fine, fine, fine.

“Gotta look good. I’m on the hunt, obviously,” you joke. It isn’t funny to him, but he lets out a laugh.

“You’re hopeless.”

You two stop at a convenience store first, and you all but sprint to the drinks. He had this ritual down to a science. You grab two different color slushies, and he grabs whatever odd snack catches your collective stomachs eye today. Today the two of you decide to split a cookie, and walk to the counter. The cashier gives you a smirk, and he averts his eyes.

“This it?” The boy cocks his head, and you get the memo. You immediately jump on the opportunity.

“Mhm!” You wink, resting your chin in your hands while leaning against the counter. In all honestly, he wasn’t even that cute. At least, that’s what Rui kept telling himself.

“Don’t worry about it, than. I got you guys,” he waves you off. Score! You think, but he adds. “If I can get your number.” Rui feels like falling into the floor, how awkward! You just scribble it onto a stray receipt, winking.

“Thank you! You’re the sweetest!!” You singsong, skipping along with Rui following suite. You immediately burst into laughter, throwing a fake punch at Rui. “What a weirdo! Like I’d call him over what, 1000 yen?! I don’t even know him, yuck!”

So you did have some sense, he feels like letting out a sigh of relief. You hold your hands out.

“Which one do you want? I got your favorite!!” You look so proud, and he wants to laugh. His “favorite” isn’t actually his favorite, but he’d never tell you that.

The lie started one day in middle school, when the two of you suddenly had a weird craving for slushies. When you picked them out, you had gotten a red one and a blue one, and asked him what he wanted. While he really didn’t like red, he knew you liked blue, so he said red. Now for the past four years, you’ve always ended up getting him a red one, thinking it was his favorite. He’ll deal with it for you. Seeing your blue tongue stick out with brain freeze is better than any sugary drink anyway.

“Red, duh.” He scoffs playfully, taking a sip of it. The taste doesn’t really bother him all that much anymore. It reminds him of you.

You always let him divide the snacks, thinking he gives himself the bigger half. He never does, but he eats slower so you think he did. You skip along, enjoying it.

“Y’know, this isn’t bad. Wish they had the brownie, though. That never does us wrong.” God, don’t make him think of the ‘crack brownies’ - as you two call them. Those are great, and he likes them, so you never miss an opportunity to shove them down his throat.

“Don’t complain. Remember the egg roll incident?” He points, laughing at the memory. You two steer clear of that section now, having gotten sick.

“Ugh, I haven’t thought about that in a while! I’m never eating an egg roll again after that day! Ugh,” you gag.

Moments of silly memories like this make him feel like he’s known you forever. He can’t even remember a moment where he hasn’t loved you.

“Where’re we going now, commander?” He salutes, following the trail of sunshine you left behind.

“Where ever the wind blows us, kind sir!” You salute back, pushing him along. Your constant checks of your phone don’t go unnoticed by him, and he fights the urge to roll his eyes.

“Who’re you texting? Don’t tell me it’s that guy.” He tries to sound casual, knocking his shoulder against yours playfully.

“‘M not a total idiot, I’ll have you know!” You huff, holding your phone to your chest. “It’s just somebody we went to school with a while back, ‘m seeing if I can pull the moves.”

“Do I know him?”

“Dunno, never saw you two talking, so maybe not. He was in my english class, remember, the only class we didn’t have together?”

“Ah.”

You two walk in silence, except for when he yanks you back from the collar so you don’t walk into oncoming traffic, which amuses you greatly. You two soon arrive at the small mall, and he tails you as you run with excitement. You two browse everything, constantly pointing out cute plushies, or interesting keychains.

“Rui, look! Look!” You shake him, pointing to the back of somebody’s head inconspicuously. “Wait don’t yet- Okay, now! He’s turning around! That’s the guy! What a coincidence we see him here, right? Do you recognize him?”

Ha. Yeah, he knows this guy. He definitely knows him. He’s the one who would trip him during passing periods, he’s the one who left flowers on his desk. They make eye contact, and it’s like all of his growth left his body. He’s just the same freak from middle school, he’s still thirteen.

He shudders at the guys smirk, sensing that he definitely knows that Rui knows him. He jogs over to the two of you, and Rui already knows what’s about to happen, due to the lopsided smile on your face.

Damnit, this is the first time he doesn’t think he can act like it’s okay.

“Oh wow, what a coincidence! Must be fate we run into each other like this, ehe…” You giggle awkwardly, a dumb expression gracing your face. It’s painful seeing you that way for anybody other than him, and he looks away awkwardly.

“Must be.” He answers, swaggering closer towards you. Rui thanks whatever God above because - despite his current situation - at least this asshole didn’t go to highschool with you guys.

He looks down at his shoes, and tries to shuffle away, knowing this jackass is about to say something. He’s quickly stopped.

“Who’s this, huh? Feel like a recognize him from somewhere…” He trails off, smirking through his nose as he turns his attention to him. “Have we met before?”

“This is Kamishiro Rui, he’s my friend! He went to middle school with us, remember?” You happily answer for him.

Ha, friend? What happened to back-up boyfriend? He’s a little hurt, to be honest.

He feels bitter, it’s unbecoming- God, he doesn’t care. He should feel bad for getting so angry over it, it’s not like you belong to him. He’s such a freak, getting attached to you like this.

He starts to pick at his fingers, then he plays with a loose string on his sweater. You two continue to chat like nothings wrong, and he keeps thinking. It’s something he’s gotten good at recently.

He stops feeling bad about himself for a second- a split second where he resents you, and wishes his pain upon you. Wants you to know what it’s like to be so disgustingly, guiltily, revoltingly obsessed with someone. In this split second, he can’t even find it in himself to feel guilty about it, which is unlike him. He wishes you felt love like this, that you were as psychotic about it.

But this doesn’t last long, because he remembers that he loves you more than anything. He’s lucky to be your friend. You’re a great friend, you’re an amazing person, you’re the sun, the sun, the sun.

He’s the pavement, he has to remember.

“I’m- I’ll leave you to it, y’know? Fabric store.” He stutters, choking on his voice. You don’t even notice, waving him off.

You do, however, remember to press his shoulder, uttering an absentminded “Okay, Rui, bye,” and he remembers again how perfect you are for doing it subconsciously. He lets himself feel the touch, long after he’s walked away. He deserves it after the trouble he’s reliving.

When he makes it to the fabric store - which he really didn’t need anything from, Nene had gotten some the other day - he can’t help himself from wishing he could just go home. Malls were always overwhelming already, and now his saving grace has the attention of another man. He walks through aisles, but realizes that he now has to buy something.

‘Least he knows that social cue, he laughs bitterly, running his hands across his face in frustration. He’s so ridiculous.

Meanwhile, you were chatting up a storm. It was your first time talking in person since middle school, after all! You feel giddy for a while, but it cuts abruptly. You feel a strange sense of urgency, something’s missing.

Oh, your best friend.

But where had he gone? You’re sure he was just here. You smile apologetically at the cute boy, putting on your best performance.

“Oh, I better go get my friend now. I don’t like walking home when it’s late. Was nice seein’ you, let’s hang out soon, ‘kay?” You singsong, stepping closer. You want to give yourself a pat on the back, you’re so cute.

He rolls his eyes, and you’re hit with a wave of uneasiness. That noise he made sounds strangely dismissive, he’s not the kind of guy to be a jerk though, you must be hearing things-

“Leave ‘im. Between you and me, he was a total freak in middle school. Probably is now, too. Probably likes you or somethin’, total nutcase.” His voice sounds so casual, like it’s not the douchiest thing you’ve heard all day.

You let other men walk all over you, sure. You let them cheat on you, lie, whatever. But you’re not about to stand here and insult Rui. He’s the only untouched thing in your life - the only person who isn’t cruel. He’s so gangly and awkward, but in the best way. You could live a million times and not be able to deserve him, at least you think so. He’s so unusual, and that’s what you love most about him. Little things like not liking loud lights, or liking the red slushies the best, make your heart buzzy with familiarity. He’s the one constant in your life.

You’ve been awfully worried about him recently, though. His particularly (as you like to call it) has gone to the an extreme, and it’s been a battle getting him to eat real food. You’re not blind, you see the way he’s been spacing out, or tapping a little too much. You just thought he’d been overwhelmed. He worries you to death sometimes, but despite all of his own struggles, he always seems to not care about it, deciding to always be there for you instead. Ah, he’s just such an amazing guy - no, not guy, he’s not anything like those other boys you talk to. He’d never insult someone like that. He’s not just a guy, he’s like your person.

Yeah, he’s definitely your person.

Your heart sputters at the thought, and you feel something you’ve never really felt before - save for hugs between the two of you that lasted just a second too long, or words a little too romantic. The feeling makes your mind fuzzy, and your heart hurt terribly with something you could only place as homesickness.

Oh.

“I,” you begin, backing away. “Yeah, I’m sorry but I’ll really be going now-“

“What? C’mon I was just messing with you, even though having guy friend’s kinda weird.” He rolls his eyes.

“Yeah whatever, I’ll call you back,” you say dismissively.

You’re totally lying, you laugh, you’re not calling him back.

He didn’t seem to like that.

“Damn, can’t even joke around with you people. Whatever, weirdo, sorry I insulted your little boyfriend.” The change in tone amuses you.

Yeah, good riddance, pal.

You turn away, walking through the mall with pace. It takes a while, but you spot him watching a pet stores aquarium.

He’s a funny one.

You wave your hands, trying to get his attention. He swallows, knowing that it’s probably to ask him if it’s cool to walk home by himself. Emotions are stupid, and ironically, you both think that at the same time.

“Rui! Rui! Hey c’mon, let’s go home, yeah?” You smile, face feeling warm. It’s a different feeling from when you usually talk to him. He looks at you, a little shocked. He had assumed you were smiling wide because you set up a date, so he turns his head.

“Where is he, huh?” He looks away, back to the fish tank. You shift in place, was he mad at you? You’re a little irritated at the mention of the guy, though, and huff.

“Don’t worry about that. Seems like I only attract douchebags, so I decided to go.” You explain, poking his shoulder. “Hey,” you start, “let’s just walk home, I wanna talk to you about something.” The idea makes you feel dizzy, but you’ll have to illustrate your feelings one day.

You can leave out the “I think I’m in love with you” part, you think.

The two of you walk in an excruciating silence, staring down at the reflection of the setting sun in the puddles. His heart tightens, remembering his earlier comparison. Even now, you’re so perfect. Even if he’s frustrated with you - despite you turning down the guy in the end (he doesn’t know why, he wanted to ask) - even if he’s ready to scream, and cry, and ask you what it is he did for you to be so turned off by him, he still thinks you’re the most heavenly, divine person to ever grace his view. He wants to be where you see him, he wants to be in your orbit.

“You’re like the sun-“ He blurts out, immediately regretting it. He didn’t mean to say that, God, he’s so fucking stupid. He sees you stop walking, smiling that same stupid, dopey, lopsided smile that he’s always so jealous of-

Oh. It’s for him.

He chokes, stopping to meet you eye-to-eye. You look up at him too, laughing giddily.

“What does that mean?”

He sputters, stepping away. “N-no it’s nothing- It was stupid anyway so-“

“No, tell me!” You urge, laughing a little harder. “What if it was something bad, ‘nd you were making fun of me? That’s not nice, Rui!”

“I- Hey-“ His voice goes a touch higher, a defensive tone rising. “That’s not-“

“Then tell me.”

“It’s just,” he breaths, trying to word it in the least creepy way possible. How does convey the fact that he sees you as a divine presence, that he sees himself as a worthless creature compared to you, without sounding like he’s hopelessly possessed by love for you? “I just- you’re so amazing,” he starts, “I thought of this stupid thing the other day when I was walking home - you know how I am - and well, I just thought of you when the sun reflected off the pavement - since it rained, y’know? - and well, it just- Sorry, it was dumb-“ He rambles, covering his face in anguish.

Nobody’s ever put that much thought into you. Sure, you’ve received a few ‘You’re so gorgeous’’s, where you’ve had to wonder where they learnt such a “big word”, but never something as poetic as that. The usual Rui-ratic explanation endeared you to him even more. You look at him, the smile never leaving. He’s just… so Rui. His stupid striped sweater, his half up hair - that you’d begged him to grow out - his eyes, whatever. Everything about him you treasure, and little do you know he cherished you even that more intensely.

“I think you’re the moon, Rui. Or maybe the earth, since I take care of you, hah!” You snicker, stepping closer to him. He takes a step back in return, and you grab his hands to make him stay put. His heart throbs, and he almost goes crashing down.

“I.. I don’t-“

You yank his hands, making him look back up at you. “Hey, Rui, I,” you look at him assuringly, “I wanna say something, and you can’t laugh okay?”

He holds his breath, so do you.

Fuck it, just tell him.

“I think I’m in love with you, Rui.” You gaze at him, the words shooting out faster than you can second guess them.

“I don’t-“ He breaks away, his fists balling up. You messed up, you think, you really, really messed up. “I’m not- I’m not going to- You can’t just say that because you got rejected. I- It wouldn’t be nice to- You don’t love me-“

“Rui,” you beg, grabbing his arm again, “holding hands on the way to school, cuddling while doing homework, knowing everything about eachother, these aren’t-“ You breath, “I’ve wanted somebody to love me for so long, Rui, and I was so blind to the fact that I was loved. But the love that I felt for you, - that I feel for you - Rui, isn’t the kind where I can be- where I can just be so- so normal about those things!” You monologue, saying whatever’s on your mind. You’re the rambling one now.

“I found myself comparing you to these piece-of-garbage dude’s I’m always with, wishing I could just date somebody like you instead! But now I realize that it is you-“

His heart falls into his gut, and he breaks free from you again. His hands move to his face, covering his eyes. His voice is broken and cracky as he begins to cry. “That was- you-“ He pulls you into a desperate embrace, arms holding you like you’ll disappear. “You shouldn’t, you’re wrong.” He sobs, “I’m- the way I love you is- You don’t understand, the way I feel isn’t normal I- My love is disgusting, and horrible, and depraved-“ He shakes, you rub his back. “You are so perfect compared to me, I’d never be able to- I love you so much, more than friends are supposed to, more than anyone’s supposed to at our age-“

“Rui, hey Rui please don’t cry.” You beg, smoothing out the ridges in his sweater. “I don’t- I don’t agree with that, and I can scream that at you, but I’m sure you won’t believe me. You’re not disgusting for feeling emotions different, Rui that’s what I love about you.”

“Stop- stop saying my name like that. It’s too hard to-“

“Rui, I love you. You don’t need to accept it, but I love you. More than being in love, more than being loved-“

“I love you, too,” his voice cracks, “that’s why I’m so scared. I don’t want to ruin a friendship that’s all I have, if this is just- I’m scared I’d lose you in any way, and I can’t live in a world where you don’t see me. I won’t. It’s sounds horrible but-“ He stops as you pull away from the hug, and wipes his face hastily. You put your pinky out, and his stomach drops again.

“C’mon, just like when we were kids. Pinky promise that no matter what, we’ll always see each other. That way you don’t need to worry anymore, y’know? I never break my kissy pinky promises, ever.”

Just like when you two were little.

He locks his with yours, just like you taught him all those years ago. He remembers your shared handshake for theater, he remembers your shared handshake for testing, and he remembers the song you two had to duet for choir - when you have forced him into it for a year. He holds everything of you so dear to his heart, you endear everything about him to you as well.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“I see you.”

“I see you, too.”

You two kiss your hands, then bring them down, still interlinked. You stare at him, and he stares back at you. In a moment of profound sincerity, you lean forward, and kiss him. It’s slow and gentle, and you unlock your hands half way through to hold his face, which he mirrors. His heart settles for the first time. You see him. He’s your moon, your earth, you’re his sun, his stars.

He’s suddenly alarmed by a quick pushing off of him, gasping out a “Rui!”

“I-“ he pants, wiping his mouth. “Hm?”

“we’re in the middle of a park!”

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meetmypointlessaddiction · 2 months ago

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dumb and in love | l.howlett

Summary: you and logan were friends but you were in love with him. too bad your flirting skills are below par.

Tags: really bad flirting from reader, fluff, slight ooc logan (?)

“Just flirt with him babe. The man is clearly in love with you so where’s the harm in going for it?” Storm had joined you in your midnight kitchen adventure, the pair of you sitting at the counter snacking on some cereal as she listened to your boy problems.

“And what if he’s just being nice? What if I ruin everything? Plus, I am too socially awkward to flirt. You saw what happened yesterday when I tried to flirt with him.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Breakfast at the mansion was peaceful once the children were fed and out of the way. The adults could sit down and enjoy their food and could catch up. Logan and you had been talking, complaining about lessons, talking about plans to go out on the weekend, the normals stuff when you let it slip.

“I think you’re cute.” Storm and Jean both looked your way, the pair of them knowing about your crush on Logan, but the man just looked at you confused. “I umm… I said can you pass me the fruit?”

~~~~~~~~~~

“That wasn’t your fault, he wasn’t listening and it would’ve been awkward to repeat yourself. Look, the only way you’re ever gonna know if he feels the same is by asking him so go for it. Plus, if things got awkward, we’d much rather keep you here anyway, we’ll get rid of Logan.” Rolling your eyes at her as you stand and put the cereal away. As much as Storm was trying to encourage you, the thought of losing everything with Logan was enough to put you off the idea completely. You would just have to suffer in silence.

For weeks after, you basically ignored Logan, avoiding him at meals, going to bed earlier than normal to avoid seeing him and not joining the group on their outings. Eventually, he decided to put a stop to it and cornered you in your classroom. “You’re avoiding me.” There was no room for arguing in his tone, you’d been caught out.

“Mhm. I have a class to get to Logan, I’m covering for Sco-.”

“No you’re not. Jean is covering for you. We’re talking about this. Now.” Well that was not how you were expecting this to go. “What have I done that’s made you hate my guts hmm?”

“It’s not a you thing, it’s a me thing. I don’t hate you, I am just madly in love with you and I can’t flirt to save my life.” The truth came spilling out of your mouth before you could stop it and Logan just stared at you, mouth open before his lips quirked into a smirk.

“Madly in love with me huh? I suppose I know the feeling.” It takes you a minute to realise what he said and for the dots to connect before it is your turn to stare gormlessly at him.

“I beg your fucking finest pardon?”

“Bub, I’ve been trying to drop hints for months but you’re too fucking dense to catch on. You think I make breakfast for everyone? Watch shitty chick flicks with everyone?”

“I… I thought you were being nice?”

“You’re an idiot.”

Over time, you would learn that that phrase was his version of ‘I love you’, the phrase that he had said so many times to you over the course of your friendship was his way of loving you.

please like, comment and reblog if you enjoyed, it encourages me to write more :)

Dividers: @coolcatsgraphics

#logan howlett fluff #logan howlett x you #logan x reader #james logan howlett #logan howlett #logan howlett fanfiction #logan howlett x reader #logan wolverine #logan howlett headcanon #hugh jackman x female reader #hugh jackman #hugh jackman fanfic #hugh jackman fluff #hugh jackman fanfiction #hugh jackman x you #hugh jackman x reader

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dc418writes · 3 months ago

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Trial & Error

Summary🪄: Joel tries to help you get some rest

🚨: no outbreak!Joel, minor age gap (reader is late 20s, Joel is mid 30s), AU with no Sarah (pls don’t hate me 🫣) pretty much all fluff💕

A/N🎤: this is my submission to @beefrobeefcal ‘s Married Joel Sat on Me challenge (please check out the other works and/or submit your own if you’d like☺️!), and I hope you guys like what I came up with✨

*DISCLAIMER!: I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP of pictures used as they were all found via Pinterest. Although my writings are imagined with a black reader, anyone can read and enjoy😌*

“Baby,” Joel drawls in that deep voice smooth like silk that always makes you melt, “you should be sleeping.” His lips sweetly press against your forehead after carefully tilting your head back so your doe eyes would be on him.

He wasn’t surprised to see your silhouette through the front curtains as his black pickup pulled in the driveway. The living room illuminated with flashes of blue as you watched something he couldn’t quite tell - if he had to guess, probably one of baby Morgan’s favorite shows you tended to play so she could calm down.

It had been a bit of a habit now with your newfound insomnia. And having to take care of a sick five-month-old while being under the weather yourself didn’t help.

“I’m not tired though.” Even upside down, it was obvious to see the exhaustion in those pretty features that had him addicted from the first time he saw you. The darkened puffiness under your eyes. The dull look to your usually bright skin.

“But you need sleep. The past couple days you’ve only been gettin three, maybe four hours.” Although calm, you could feel his concern. Knew he was stressed that his two girls were dealing with things he couldn’t seem to help with. Especially not with this new house taking up all his time.

“I don’t know what else to do.” You sigh, leaning your head on his shoulder as he sits beside you draping his arm around the back of the dark sectional. Any other time, his overall presence along with the warmth emanating from his wood and leather scented skin would have you relaxed enough that you could easily find rest. Now it was just one of a long list of futile attempts.

“Wanna try those sleep gummies again?”

“I think my body’s used to it since it didn’t work that first night.”

His deep hum rumbles under your fingertips on his sternum. “Tea?”

You shake your head, “Being sick made me all tea’d out. Plus I think the chamomile’s gone.”

“Could always try warm milk?,” he suggests with a slight grin. He already knew your answer, but he loved watching your cute, button nose crinkle in disgust.

“I’d rather be knocked over the head,” you answer making your husband deeply chuckle. “Let’s face it, this is just how things are for now. I’ve tried pretty much everything.”

Joel wasn’t one to easily accept defeat though thanks to his stubborn nature.

“I uh was talkin’ about it with a buddy on the job. He mentioned something about a..weighted blanket? Said it works for his kid so I tried to find one at the store, but the lady said they’re all out for now.”

Tilting your head up, a soft smile curls along your lips meeting Joel’s cocoa gaze focused on you. It shouldn’t be anything surprising at this point of your relationship, - being together for three years and married for two - but you can’t help how your heart flutters at how caring he could be. If a certified cure was revealed today or tomorrow, you know he’d make a way to be the first in line.

Leaning forward, you peck his lips once before moving to his bearded jaw, “Thank you for trying.”

His mouth finds yours again easily sliding your hips, with his thick hands, to sit across his lap making you giggle between each nip and press of your lips against his. “I’ll stop by tomorrow to check again. Try that other store across town too.”

As if feeling left out from all the love, Morgan first whimpers then cries from her nursery just off from the living room. You mentally groan dreading how long it’ll take to get her back to sleep.

“I got her,” Joel states leaving a last kiss on your forehead. “You try to rest.”

“No it’s okay, I got her. Plus I’ll have to check her temp-,”

His hands only tighten on your hips preventing you from standing. “Baby I can do it. Relax.”

“What if she’s hungry?”

“I can warm a bottle.”

“I can at least help though,” you pout trying to wiggle free. Instead, you’re manhandled to lie down with your husband sitting on your lower back and butt pressing you into the plush cushions. Turning your upper body as much as you could, your eyebrows slightly furrow in shock and amusement while Joel just crosses his arms as if you’re now permanently part of the furniture. “J-Joel! Wha-?”

“Ya left me no choice. It was the only way I could get you to stay.”

“By crushing me with your big ass?!”

You could be so dramatic. “Hey, this big ass is your fault,” he laughs. “Fillin’ me up with all that food and pastries.”

Marriage had been good to Joel. His mental health and financial stability had improved, and he seemed overall a happier person. The only drawback seemed to be the effect it had on his waistline. His once toned abdomen now a pleasant pouch and thighs a bit thicker causing him to go up a size in his jeans - and even then they still hugged tight.

Not that you minded. You loved Joel’s new ‘dad bod’ just as much as his more slender form. Sometimes even more as you watched him get ready for work or walk around in his sweatpants as he carried and played with Morgan. If it wasn’t for your current situation, you might even be pregnant with baby number two you were so attracted to him.

“Sure, it’s my fault and not that burger and fries you get every day for lunch,” you playfully huff trying to shimmy your way from his hold.

He slightly tilts his head from left to right knowing you had a point, “Alright fair.” Eventually, you finally submit to the fact you weren’t leaving letting your arms extend in front of you. And dare you say, it even began to feel comfortable. “Now, if I get up I trust you’re gonna stay here?”

“Yes seeing that my back is broken,” you reply rolling your eyes. That earns you a warning - yet always playful - smack to the back of your thigh as he stands now leaving you to the cold, open air. “Good girl. I’ll be right back.”

The softest of smiles forms of your lips rolling onto your back to watch him happily stride to tend to his baby girl. “Hey love bug! How ya feelin huh?” Her cries instantly silence into hiccups as soon as she’s lifted to lie on his chest. She even babbles as if having a full conversation while he presses the back of his hand to her forehead. “No fever that’s good.”

A certain, familiar smell clues Joel to what the issue is though. “We gotta get this diaper off you babygirl,” he states moving to lie her on the changing table. “That’ll make you feel better right?” It’s like she understands every word reaching her chubby arms up with a short giggle. They grow into excited squeals as Joel takes turns blowing raspberries onto her bare stomach and tickling that spot under her chin between cleaning her up with baby wipes.

Such a daddy’s girl through and through.

It takes maybe ten minutes more of coos mixed with rocking and bouncing before Joel has her asleep again; carefully lowering her into her crib for the night. ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star’ playing on a low, constant loop from her star projector to make sure she stays that way as he eases out her room and shuts the door behind him.

His ebony eyes are trained on you now padding the short distance to the couch and leaning over your body. That one curl at the top of his head tipping forward. “Alright, your turn princess.”

You only lift your arms with a smile letting him lift you over his broad shoulder to carry you down the hall to your shared bedroom. Luckily you’re already in your pajamas when you gently flop against the brown comforter. He leaves you to get comfortable - shifting under the covers and wiggling to find that sweet spot - while he discards his clothes in the bathroom to shower and brush his teeth.

In a few minutes, he’s appearing through the misty doorway with wet almond strands still trying to dry and a pair of black boxer briefs over his hips. The little “ooh” that slips from your lips as he slides into bed makes him furrow his brows in confusion while you twist to lie on your stomach reaching back to pat your bottom. “I got an idea.”

“Yeah?,” he smirks wetting his bottom lip. “We definitely haven’t tried that before.”

“Jesus, get your mind out the gutter. I mean crush me again,” you laugh.

Although he scoffs in faux offense, he still does as you say positioning himself so half his body covers yours and long leg nearly straddles your back. His nose mere centimeters from yours blowing steady streams of air as you practically share your pillow. “What’s your plan here?”

“Well, until we find one, I was thinking..maybe you could be my weighted blanket,” you shyly explain. “I know it’s probably dumb, but earlier-,”

“Worth a try,” Joel winks closing the small gap to peck your nose then lips. His fingertips tracing soothing lines back and forth along your neck.

For a while, you both just lied there talking about your respective days or whatever came to mind. Around one in the morning, Joel could see your blinks become slower and slower until it was an apparent struggle to keep your eyes open. Your words even beginning to slur and answers sound like adorable nonsense.

You hadn’t even realized you eventually drifted off until the next morning when you were woken up by Morgan’s cries through the monitor. The sun shining a bright golden hue through the crack in the curtains.

A note on the nightstand is the first to catch your attention - clearly written by your husband from the tilted and slightly mushed together handwriting - making you tiredly smile.

‘Glad to see you got some rest xx’

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #Joel miller x woc #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller au #the last of us #pedro pascal characters #Pedro pascal #joel sat on me 2024

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lani-heart · 11 months ago

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|| series masterlist || next // previously ||

genre(s) -> angst, fluff, smut, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> choi san x reader warning(s) -> soft smut, loosing virginity(s) words -> 2.1K

abstract -> San is struggling with his upcoming heat... especially with never experiencing it before

san's perspective

Two months with her have felt like bliss.

I think I loved her. I’ve never had anyone care for me the way she does. I’ll forever be in her debt… and I’ll always be by her side as long as she’ll let me.

Along the lines of admiration, I’ve gained a weird feeling that I couldn’t explain. It was probably the same feeling that makes Wooyoung the pervert he is.

“Everything is normal, there's nothing to worry about,” the bunny-looking doctor said… She was worried about me. I feel hot and Wooyoung has been getting on my nerves…

“He’s experiencing heat, from what Kun said he’s never truly experienced it. Which probably means he’s always been under heat suppressants” he explained.

Heat? I’ve never been allowed to experience it before…

“So if he doesn't decide to take it, his heat will be pretty intense and may last longer than it usually would. Not to mention he’s an exotic hybrid so there's different mannerisms he may display” he explained as he handed y/n a pamphlet.

We walked out of there and now on our way back home.

“San… Do you want to take suppressants?” she asked me and I shook my head. “Hybrid hotel?” she asked me and I hated the thought of being around hybrids I didn’t know let alone have sex with them.

I shook my head and she sighed seeming to be out of options.

I wanted to suggest so she could help me… but that wouldn’t happen. If we were to spend my heat together, I'd probably consider her my mate after.

I really wanted to just have her to myself that way… but it was probably the heat talking. Making me imagine all the different types of scenarios I could have with her.

How was I supposed to survive this heat?

y/n’s perspective

Doyoung explained how exotic hybrids often show different behaviors than regular domesticated hybrids. Panthers specifically are possessive and are polygamous but won’t allow the female to be mated with another male during heat… he explained that this might be the reason why he was being territorial with Wooyoung.

It was a little different with hybrids though…

This would also be his first real heat… which also meant he never…

“Are you okay?” San asked me and I nodded. “You’re just really red…” he said and I tried to cool my cheeks with my hands. “Are you getting sick?” he asked as we stopped walking and he started feeling my forehead and my neck for heat.

“San, I’m okay,” I said and he nodded.

We continued walking in silence… probably trying to figure the situation out himself.

He really is different from the version of him I met two months ago… no longer stubborn and solitary. He’s also really caring… with me and Wooyoung. He was the sweetest hybrid now…

We made it back to the apartment and we waited for the elevator to ding. San hates the elevator… he isn’t used to bell sounds yet. So he always covers his ears when he enters and leaves the elevator.

Recently he’s started leaning towards me for comfort. I will pet his head trying to distract him. I even heard him purr sometimes… anything to help him.

“You guys are back!!” I heard Wooyoung yell as me and San finally were home. “Did you find out why he’s been so mean?” he asked and I sighed. “Heat,” I said and his ears went up in realization.

“Ohhhh… So what are you gonna do?” he asked him and he shook his head. “San can’t go to a hybrid hotel, and he doesn’t want to do heat suppressants,” I said and he nodded. “I’m not helping him,” Wooyoung said jokingly, causing San to click his tongue and go straight to his room.

“Does that mean I get to change room then?” Wooyoung asked and I was confused. “Why would you witch room?” I said and he pouted. “He's mean to me!! I also don't want to hear him get off to himself” he said and I felt my face redden again.

“I-It’ll be the same way when you’re in heat, Wooyoung,” I managed to say and he nodded.

“You could always help him?” he asked and I felt my face get even hotter if it was even possible... “It's a suggestion… Heats are painful by yourself,” he said.

Wooyoung went to the kitchen, probably to experiment with another recipe while I went to San’s room… would he even want my help?

His door opened before I could even knock. “I heard your footsteps,” he explained and I nodded. “We need to figure this out, San… it's only gonna get worse if you ignore it,” I said and he sighed. He let me in and I sat on his bed whilst he sat on his desk chair.

“I don’t want to go to a hotel… nor mate with someone I don’t know” he explained and I nodded. “I know… and heat suppressants would be bad for your health since you’ve been on it for too long” I explained and he nodded.

“Do you want my help?” I suggested and he looked at me with widened eyes. “Don’t say things like that…” he said shyly. “Huh? Why? Was it an offense?” I asked now worried and he shook his head.

“If you mate with me, you'll be mine. We’ll be mated… that's the equivalent to marriage to hybrids' ' he said and I understood why he didn’t ask now…

“You’ll be mine forever… that's a lot of commitment that a human might not want” he said and I sighed. I didn’t think of any romantic relationship when I first adopted him… not to mention sexual but now it was different…

“I don’t think I'd mind?” I said and he looked at me with another shocked expression. “You’ll be mine, y/n. In every type of way possible” he said now standing over me. I nodded… “I don’t mind… as long as you don’t either” I said and he chuckled.

“Are you sure?” he asked and I nodded. “Once I start there's no way to go back. Mine y/n… your body, soul, and heart will be mine” he said and I smiled. “Does that mean you’ll be mine?” I asked and I saw him smile softly. “Kitty, I'm already yours,” he said and I was shocked.

“I’ve… I've never mated with anyone before though” he confessed. “I’ve never had sex with anyone before,” I said softly and he groaned. “I wouldn’t want to hurt you,” he said and I shook my head.

“It’s okay… I do feel bad that I feel like I'm taking advantage of you. You're in heat-” “I’m still conscious… I know what's happening. I’m not deep into my heat to feel the need to fuck anything and everything” he explained. I nodded.

“I do wish that I confessed in a different way… but I never expected you to think of me that way,” he said and I shook my head. “I didn’t think I would… but you’ve changed in the two months of being here,” I said and he nodded.

“I promise to be gentle with you”

No one's perspective

He lifted you up briefly to help lay you down on his bed. His face is now touching his nose with yours… The both of you leaning in to kiss each other. It was a gentle peck at first but...

The kiss no longer an innocent first kiss, instead messy and desperate for what's to come… his grip on your waist lowered down to your hips as his bulge found your clothed core

Moaning into your kiss as he pulled away with a string of saliva connecting the two of you. He chuckled… “Your lips look so pretty swollen” he muttered as you felt shy with the amount of praise he was giving.

“My pretty little mate,” he said as he tugged on your sweater… “Let’s take some of this off,” he said as he helped take off your top layer of clothes leaving you in only a bra.

He leaned into your neck to suck and nip on the sensitive skin. You couldn’t help moaning at the feeling.

Knowing that tomorrow the marks would be visible to the world… mainly Wooyoung. He kept kissing downwards to your chest until he met with your bra.

He didn’t even try to figure out how to take it off… instead with his claws out ripped them not even letting you complain and he now stood up and groped them.

“So soft…” he muttered and he chuckled. “Why aren’t you letting yourself go, kitty? Scared the pesky little fox will find out? He already knows… he can hear better than me” he confessed and you only felt embarrassed.

“Don’t be shy… give the pervert fox a little show. He’s had a crush on you for years now” he said and you couldn’t even react “Wh–” getting cut off by your own moans. He was now rubbing your core through your clothes.

“No, going back now. I want you to show the pesky fox you’re mine. My mate… not his” he muttered as he pulled down your pants to reveal your underwear.

He pulled your underwear to the side and started with kitty licks against your clit. Stopping your moans by covering your mouth which San chuckled at. “Give me your hands,” he said sweetly. He stood up slightly to grab your arms and now intertwined my hands with his…

“Please… for me kitty. I wanna hear how I’m doing” he said as this time he flattened out his tongue against you. “Pretty pussy… my mate, mine” he muttered. San is already drunk in pleasure, whilst you slowly forget about everything and only focus on the pleasure he was giving you.

“San!!” you moaned out, everything in this room was now sinful with the messy nature of San, and now you moaned his name without thinking of the fox lurking in the apartment. Your moaning slowly got louder each time San teased your clit signaling how close you were to him.

He finally let go of your hands as he now tested a finger inside your pussy as you were now gripping his hair. “Close, kitty?” he teased and you couldn’t even answer once he found where to unravel you.

Everything felt like too much as you came, “I should’ve done this sooner” he said as he teased your now sensitive clit.

“How much more do you think you can handle?” he muttered. “I want to… help you” you barely made out as you tried coming back from orgasm number one of many.

“You’re gonna help me with my heat? Gonna be my mate… my little toy?” he teased and you whined at his teasing now overstimulating you. You couldn’t even close your legs to try to stop him… not with his tail wrapped around your ankle.

“So messy,” he said as he slapped your clit making your hips jolt up. “Cute… such cute responses you give me~ Do you like everything I'm giving you?” he asked and you nod, not trusting your voice.

“I worried about how I'd handle the heat… but no matter how much you learn, they never tell you how addicted I feel to you right now,” he confessed.

He signaled for you to intertwine your hands again.

“We can't stop here if you need rest?” he asked, now worried about the next step being too much for you. “ It's okay,” you said and he nodded. He took back one of his hands to free his cock out. Now showing himself to you and rubbing himself against your pussy

You could even see the penile spines on his cock giving you friction on your pussy and clit making you moan again. He lined himself up only to look at you worriedly.

“You can back out now… you don’t have to help me” he said and you smiled softly at him. “I want to… don’t you want to make me your mate?” you asked him and he groaned. “So badly, kitty” he muttered as he entered the tip, the both of you now moaning at how each other feels. “You're so tight” he moaned out, “Big” you managed to mutter out, it was painful for a while but San let you adjust a bit while praising you.

“You can do this kitty, come on,” he said as one of your hands stayed intertwined and the other now around your jaw. He slowly sank himself in helping you adjust by staying still and kissing your neck. “Pretty little mate… mine now” he muttered to himself.

Feeling frustrated slightly you moved your hips slightly to feel relief and he started moving, thrusting in and out trying to maturely chase his high.

“Close” he muttered as the two of you virgins came another time. This time San was with you and coating your insides white… he didn’t even pull out of you as he collapsed slightly on top of you catching his breath.

His tail twitching behind him frantically…

“Oh kitty… you’re not going anywhere until I breed you over and over, showing everyone especially the pesky fox your mine”

@wonuangel @danirael @angelsaway @krissroo @minkysmilk @mayonnaise-on-toast @robertsbbygirl @superbbananananana @hyukssunflower @kitty4hwa @justconniez @senpai-of-doom @kibs-and-bits @caityelise99 @ilovekinny @ateezennie23 @wooahaelemons @purplelady85 @watamotee33@chidess97 @littlelostdemonofthelight @maliamaiden @burntarm1n @spooo00oky @eastleighsblog @momo-peachy @kitstar1117 @quartzpirate @sunnyhokyu @iwishiwasrichasfuck @theginger543210 @pandolinka @ddaeing @kpopnightingale @slid3er @kekdo-520 @puppyminnnie @sparklinghwa222 @calicanbeevil @itsvxlentine @atinism @loumin908 @smally97 @rxnexxi @acetruepunk @majesticbeluga @namjooncrabs @tashizxy @itstheghostofmypast @smilefordongil @teeziny @totallynotlyntv @kyeos4ng @prodsh00ky @acescavern

please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3

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mrsriddlenott · 11 months ago

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Ex!Mattheo Riddle x Muggleborn!Reader

Angsty asf,Break Ups, Language, Voldemort, Wizarding War.

Summary: You and Mattheo were just wrong for each other, destined to be ripped apart. He hurt you trying to protect you, and even apart is trying to protect you still, but he can’t think of everything.

“We’re done okay, I am done. I don’t want this anymore Mattheo,” You screamed as he stopped, shocked in front of you, “I can’t keep doing this.”

“What are you- you’re not saying….” You scoffed as he approached you again, stepping back so he couldn’t touch you like he so desperately wanted to. “You can’t be serious y/n we basically just started.”

“No we didn’t! That’s the fucking problem, we’ve been doing this for months and I thought it meant something to you and then I find out your friends don’t even know who I am??” You scoffed, rolling your eyes and crossing your arms as he tried to speak, “You wasted my time, if you wanted to just be fuck buddies I’d have been fine with that and I would have kept it a secret for you if you asked but you made me feel like…..” You laughed at your own stupidity as you turned away from Mattheo’s pleading eyes.

“Princess I didn’t just-“ You cut him off before he could finish, turning back around yelling as tears welled in your eyes, “You lied to me Mattheo, you said you wanted something real, you told me you wanted someone you could trust and that you had finally found someone and all along you were the untrustworthy one!” Mattheo’s hands fell to his sides as he tried to form words, but nothing would come out.

“Were you embarrassed of me?! Is that why? Did you feel like all your rich, perfect friends would hate you for being with me or did you just want me for fun until you needed to find the pureblood future wife your father expects you to have!?” You breathed heavily as you registered your words, his eyes shone with tears at the mention of his father and only locked on yours for a second before turning to your door and tugging it open.

Mattheo stopped, weighing the odds before turning back to you with tears in his eyes, “I’d much rather marry you….but that can’t happen because he won’t allow it. I guess we did waste our time after all.” And in a matter of seconds he was gone, from the dorm, the school, from your life, no one actually knew were he went but there were rumors he left to join his father’s cause, which you just couldn’t allow yourself to think were true.

It had been weeks since you last saw his face or heard his voice, after months of seeing each other in every second of free time it hurt to wake to the reminder that you were alone. But today was different, when you dressed and returned to your bed after a morning shower a neat envelope awaited your arrival, you recognized his hand writing immediately and tore it open.

Y/n, I’m sorry. I can’t take back what I’ve done now, when you hear it you’re going to hate me and the thought breaks me. Please don’t blame yourself because I had to, I could never let him hurt you and despite everything I did to keep you safe he found out about you. He made me do things I can’t say here, things I see in my dreams on nights you stray from them but I promise one day you will be happy and safe. I will give up my life to make it so.

Tears blurred your vision as you tried to fathom what Mattheo had done, what his father could have forced him to do. What he had done to protect you. You crashed to your knees, sobbing and wishing you could somehow get a timeturner to go back to that night, beg him to stay, apologize for being so stupid. Of course he had kept you a secret for your own protection, the son of Voldemort couldn’t be walking around with a Muggleborn Hufflepuff who could barley pass by. He had kept his friends in the dark so they couldn’t tell anyone, he had snuck you around the school, not because he was ashamed, but because he wanted you safe. You had to get him back, no matter what he did in his father’s name he was yours and you were his, always.

By the next week everyone had heard the stories, Muggle and Muggleborns being tortured, “traitors” to the cause being executed, you didn’t know if he was involved, not for sure but a part of you knew. There were signs, people whispering about a new lord in training, a new way for Voldemort to gain power using his son as a weapon. It wasn’t long before most of Mattheo’s friends had gone too, making it all the more obvious where he had gone. It hurt you more to know he was doing it for you, every name of the missing and dead reminded you it was all to protect you. You began to lose hope that you’d ever see him again, that he was lost, forever his father’s minion.

You sat with your back against the cold stone wall of the astronomy tower, letting the smoke of an un-hit cigarette waft past you as you lost yourself in a deep thought. You had been having trouble sleeping, imaging the awful things being done to Mattheo and by Mattheo was bad enough but it only got worse at night. You’d found yourself gravitating to Mattheo’s spot often these days, and you couldn’t stop yourself from wondering what life would be like in a few months. You’d be gone from Hogwarts for good, and who knew what that meant for you now, you had just begun to imagine leaving into the world alone when the sound of rushed footsteps caught you off guard, but not more than the voice that came with the halt of shoes on marble, “What the fuck are you doing here?! I thought you’d be in your dorm,” He spun around to watch the door, cursing to himself as though a plan had gone terribly wrong, and you supposed it had.

He looked tired, his hair disheveled with large bags under his eyes and his voice seemed different, harder, “You need to get the fuck up now and run, just go hide somewhere please if they see you they’ll” He was cut off by the sound of more boots quickly ascending the steps up the tower before he was grabbing you and aggressively trying to shove you into a closet too late.

“There’s the girl,” a gruff male voice shouted as the door swung open, “Knew if we followed you we’d find her.” Mattheo’s head hung as his voice broke, “no, no, I didn’t do it all for nothing.” He turned quickly, his arms out and blocking you body with his, “He can’t have her, I did everything he asked.”

“Clearly not since you’re here,” a second, larger man, cackled out, “Didn’t Daddy tell you to sit tight up in your mansion Pretty Boy.” The man laughed as though he was the funniest man alive as everyone stared back and forth, recognizing all four of us wouldn’t be leaving this room if things didn’t go as planned. “He can’t have her.” Mattheo spat again, with less conviction.

“Well you know the deal Handsome, and the Dark Lord is tired of waiting on your decision, you take the mark, we leave this pretty little thing alone and you never speak to her again….if not we have orders to make her death last awhile.” You flinched behind Mattheo’s muscular frame, not at your impending, excruciating death, but at the thought of Mattheo officially joining the ranks of the Death Eaters. If he had the mark there was no way out, no convincing the courts to spare him, even if he survived after all he had done that mark is a one way ticket to a Dementor’s Kiss. “No Mattheo you can’t”

Mattheo turned to you as your voice shook, tears falling down both your faces as he grabbed your cheeks tightly, kissing you as though you were air and he was hyperventilating. His head rested on your forehead as he thumbed your tears away, “I don’t have a choice Baby, I love you and I always will.” He tugged you into his arms, his lips next to your ear as he whispered low enough just for you to hear, “I am going to do everything in my power to come home to you, but I want you to live your life, when you get out of here run and forget me, become a Healer like you wanted and know I’m looking out for you.” He slipped away from you, leaving one final kiss on your temple before he was tugged from the room and from your life.

And you knew, from your safety, that he had taken the mark and would eventually take his father’s place as the Dark Lord if the war didn’t end soon. Maybe then, with all that power, he could end the war and return to you, a fantasy that gave you hope in the darkest days of the war.

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msnmnt · 5 months ago

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Lay Your Love On Me

pic from pinterest 🩶

A/N: Eee, this is my first ever fic. I’ve been lurking for a long time reading so many fabulous fics and I was inspired to give it a go. It’s by no means perfect but I hope someone might enjoy it. Feedback is welcomed!

Summary: Contains smut! Sweet and comforting boyfriend Mase wants to do everything he can to make his sweetheart virgin girlfriend’s first time as good as he can. She’s a little insecure about her body but Mase is there to put her mind at ease and be the most loving boyfriend the whole way through 🩶

You pulled away from the kiss, unable to focus on anything other than the fast pounding of your heart in your chest. It was beating so fast you were sure Mason must’ve been able to hear it.

Mason had been nothing but a gentleman the whole way through your relationship, and when you had finally plucked up the courage to tell him you had never had sex before, you couldn’t have asked for a more perfect reaction. He was taken aback but ultimately he couldn’t help but love the fact that he was going to be the only one you had ever been intimate with. He was kind and comforting, assuring you that he was happy to wait however long you wanted to.

A few weeks had passed and to mark 3 months since your first date, Mason had booked a meal at your favourite restaurant, the one where you had your very first date. The make out sessions had got longer and more heated, and when Mason had gingerly asked if you’d like to go back to his for the night, it seemed like the perfect time.

“You okay, darling?” Mason’s voice was soft and gentle, snapping you out of your trance. You swallowed back the nerves, nodding your head.

He reached out to cup your face in one of his hands, caressing your cheek with gentle strokes of his thumb.

“Baby, we don’t have to do anything tonight if you don’t want to.” His voice was laced with concern and your heart fluttered at him wanting to make sure you still wanted to do this.

You shook your head, blinking away the tears that threatened to spill.

“Shit, baby, please don’t cry - I don’t want to make you cry.” The realisation hit Mason like a ton of bricks. He vowed to never hurt you and seeing you get teary infront of him for the first time, especially because of a situation he had put you in? He hated himself for putting you in that position.

“Y/n, baby, I’m so sorry, I’ve made you feel uncomfortable-“

You managed to let out a slight laugh as you wiped at the rouge tear that has slipped out. Now Mason was completely confused.

You shook your head. “You haven’t, I don’t feel uncomfortable, Mase.” You confirmed and you could see relief wash over your boyfriend’s face imminently. “You’re so kind and you treat me so well and I know you’d never make me do anything I didn’t want to-“ You babbled on before Mason interrupted.

“I wouldn’t.” He confirmed, needing you to be certain.

You nodded. “I know.”

Mason was a little confused, and so he tried to clarify how you were feeling. He just wanted to understand so he knew what he could do to make you feel better. Ultimately all he cared about was making sure his girl was comfortable.

“You wanna get under the covers so I can hold you in my arms and we can snuggle up together?” He gently grabbed one of your hands in his, intertwining your fingers together and your heart beamed knowing he would’ve been perfectly fine with that.

“I want to do it…” You felt your cheeks heat up as the words fell out of your mouth, internally trying to come up with how to word it. Fuck it, just tell him. “It’s just… I’m a little nervous.” That was an understatement. “I mean, look at you, you’re perect.” Mason’s heart soared at your words. “I’m just…” You sighed. “I just don’t want you to be disappointed.”

Mason furrowed his brows, a look of almost anger appearing on his face as he listened to what you were saying. “Baby, I’m not expecting anything from you-“

“No.” You sighed once more, “I mean- I mean with my body.”

Mason scrunched his face up, shaking his head in disbelief. “Why would you say that?” His words were stern.

“It’s just- come on, you look like a God’s carved your body, Mase.” He let out a slight chuckle at your exaggeration. “And me… well, we both know you’re way out of my league.”

Mason shook his head, anger infuriating him as he listened to you talk down yourself.

“I can’t believe you’d say that.”

You gulped at his reaction. You didn’t want to upset him, it was just the truth.

“It’s just… I’ve never been the most confident with my body and I still find it hard to believe you’re interested in me. Almost like imposter syndrome, you know? Like I’m not worthy of you, like I didn’t deserve to be with you.” Mason’s heart dropped as he listened you ramble on, putting yourself down. “At school, people used to say nasty things to me about my appearance, call me fat, and ugly, and well… I guess the self doubt never really goes away after years of that.”

“Baby…” Mason grabbed your hands in his, tightly squeezing your fingers. a little too tight, he was sure, but he just didn’t want to let you go. “Why haven’t you told me this before?”

You shrugged. “It was years ago, back at school. I should be over it, but deep down, I’ll always believe what I was told.”

Mason shook his head in disbelief. He couldn’t believe people would be so cruel to say these things to you, and even more so that you actually believed them.

“I guess I’m just scared…” You took a deep breath before continuing. “I’m just scared that once we’re intimate, you might realise… you could get someone skinner, someone prettier, someone better in bed…”

“Stop it!” He didn’t mean to raise his voice, but he couldn’t listen to you talk about yourself like that anymore. “Darling, how do you not seen how perfect you are?”

You scoffed in response and Mason scolded you.

“God, I just wish you could see yourself from my eyes.” You finally met his gaze, his eyes burning into yours. “Y/n, you’re the most beautiful girl I have ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on.”

You rolled your eyes at his cheesey line, not letting on that your tummy was bubbling at his kind words.

“You’re so generous and thoughtful and you make me laugh, even when I’ve had the worst day at training, you’re always there to put a smile on my face. And God, your body. Girls would kill to have your natural body, babe.”

You scoffed, dismissing Mason’s words.

“I’m serious.” he confirmed, not finding the situation funny at all. “Kids are cruel, they’re jealous, they’re bitter, they say things they don’t mean. But I’m not going to listen you to talk badly about yourself any more, okay? I’m not having it.” Mason booped your nose, making you chuckle and he was so happy he had finally managed to put a smile on your face.

“I’m sorry, I told you it was stupid.” You spoke softly, blinking away the tears in your eyes and giving Mason soft smile. He was looking at you with that stupid lovesick look on his face, and when someone as perfect as him was comforting you, it did help to make your worries settle slightly.

“When you’re ready baby, I’m going to show you how much I love you and your beautiful body, alright, darling? How much I love you, how perfect every inch of you is, how madly in love with you I am.” His eyes burnt through yours as he spoke. You swallowed the lump in your throat at the intensity of the situation. But at the same time, you felt relaxed. Safe. Like you were completely safe with Mason and you always would be.

“I think… I think I’m ready now.”

“Sweetheart, you don’t have to sa-“

You were quick to interrupt him. “I know- I want to. If you still do, that is.” You tugged your bottom lip between your teeth as you awaited his response, only to be taken by surprise when Mason lifted you from your feet bridal style, making you quickly wrap your arms around his neck.

He carefully carried you to his bedroom, kicking open the door that was ajar.

Mason flicked the lights on with you still in his arms before gently placing you down on the bed.

He positioned himself so he was hovering on top of you, supporting himself with his arms which made his biceps look bigger than ever and you squeezed your legs together, which didn’t go unnoticed by Mason.

He smirked to himself before bringing his face dangerously close to yours, his eyes flickering from your lips to your eyes then back to your lips, desperate to kiss you.

You bit your lip as he begun to lean in and brush his lips against yours. You released your bottom lips allowing him to kiss you properly, gladly parting your lips when Mason grazed his tongue over them.

He could practically hear your heart racing now and he knew your mind was probably going a thousand to a dozen right now. He knew he needed to relax you.

Mason started to leave soft kisses from your mouth to your jaw before peppering a trail of soft, closed mouth kisses down your neck. When he reached your cleavage, he looked up at you, awaiting your reaction.

You gave him a small nod, letting him know you wanted to continue, but Mason could tell you were still nervous.

He tugged at the back of his shirt and lifted it over his head, chucking it over the side of the bed, no doubt for him to find later to dress you in. When Mason noticed your eyes trace over his defined abs, your mouth opening slightly at the sight of him, he felt slightly better to continue.

“Like what you see, baby?” Mason playfully joked and you could feel the blush creeping onto your face.

“Maybe.” You replied sheepishly, turning your head to the side as you avoided his gaze.

His finger tips played with the material at the bottom of your strappy top, nervously waiting for you to tell him to continue once more. He wasn’t going to risk doing anything that could even possibly make you feel uncomfortable.

“Could we, um, would it be okay if we…” You trailed off, nerves creeping in as you didn’t want to ruin the mood. “Could we maybe turn the lights off?”

Mason felt his heart sink in his chest. “Oh, sweetheart.”

When Mason didn’t say yes straight away, you couldn’t help the tears from forming at your eyes. You felt embarrassed.

“Oh- of course we can, baby. If that’s what you want, of course we can.” He quickly muttered out, noticing your eyes going glossy. He’d never make you do anything you didn’t want to, but hearing that from the girl of his dreams, the girl who was absolutely perfect in his eyes, it physically made his heart ache.

“Please.” You sniffled and Mason nodded, reaching over to quickly flick the switch so the two were left in complete darkness apart from the slither of light from that shone from the bottom of the door form the hallway.

Maosn made his way back over to the bed, resuming his position from before which wasn’t the easiest in the dark.

“You sure you want to carry on, baby?” Mason cupped your cheek, bringing his forehead to rest onto yours, desperate for you to know that he was right there with you in every way. You nodded gently and Mason planted a soft kiss to your lips before returning his hands to the bottom of your top. This time, Mason felt you sit up, allowing him to lift your top over your head.

He kissed you a few more times before his hands attempted to find the zip to discard of your skirt. You giggled slightly when you realised he was searching in the wrong place, taking his hands in yours and leading them to the zipper.

Mason slipped your skirt off your legs, losing it somewhere in between the sheets as he climbed back onto you.

You felt a gentle breath of air before you realised Mason was back with you, his mouth nipping at the skin on your neck. He left open mouth kisses before gently biting at the skin, smiling as he soothed over the same spot with his tongue when he heard a little whimper leave your mouth.

“You like that, sweetheart?”

“Mhm.” you managed to mumble out, completely consumed by the feel of his warm lips loving on your skin.

“Just gonna grab a condom, okay, darling?”

“Okay.” you nervously but your lip, excited. The nerves were still there but the prospect of being so close to your boyfriend excited you now.

Mason fumbled about at his bedside cabinet, ultimately unable to locate his box of condoms, his frustrated grumbles making you giggle.

“Need to turn the lamp on quickly just so I can see, is that alright?”

You nodded before realising Mason probably couldn’t make you out in the darkness. “Yeah, that’s fine.”

Upon turning the lamp sitting on the bedside table on, Mason quickly located the box, mumbling a satisfied ‘ah ha!’ as he retrieved one.

You giggled at his little victory and he went to shoot you a smile, completely not thinking and just turning around to you. His breath hitched in his chest when he saw you laid there waiting for him, eyes slightly glossy with nerves but bright with love for your boyfriend and excitement for what was about to happen. That was, until you realised what had just happened, your heart sinking in your chest at the realisation.

“Oh darling, my- wow.” He couldn’t help his eyes from raking in your body.

Before you had the chance to worry any more, Mason was there for you. His heart jumped and his cock twitched as he took in the matching fushia pink lingerie set you were wearing. His insides warmed as he thought about you picking it out before he had picked you up for your date that evening.

“You’re gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous.” You had thought about this moment so many times in your head, but now it was actually here, it wasn’t nearly half as scary as you had built it up to be in your head.

In your mind, Mason would make a disgusted face, end up coming up with some shitty half assed excuse and leaving, never to see you again.

The reality was Mason’s eyes were soft with love, a genuine smile on his face as he finally took his eyes off your body to check in with you.

“I can’t believe you were worried, baby.” Mason laughed and you let out a relieved breath you didn’t know you had been holding in. “I mean, I knew you were beautiful but my God, you’re even more breathtaking than I imagined.”

Mason brushed his lips against yours before licking at your lips, hungrily kissing you when you parted your lips. He licked at the inside of your mouth, unable to stop himself from pressing up against your bare thigh, the hardness making a whimper fall from your lips.

Your hands wandered down to his waist band, your finger tips grazing at the button to his jeans that he must’ve been painful to still have on.

Mason didn’t need telling and was quick to sit up and discard of his jeans and his boxers, taking himself in his hand as giving himself a gentle few tugs as he wandered back to you.

He kissed at the skin between your cleavage before gently nipping and sucking at the flesh that spilled out the cups of your bra. Mason ran his hands around your body and you arched your back, allowing him to unclasp and peel away your bra.

“Gorgeous. So gorgeous, baby.” He mumbled, leaving more kisses to your chest before checking back in with you. “You okay, sweetheart?”

You nodded. “I think so.” It wasn’t half as scary as you thought it was going to be.

“You want me to turn the lamp back off, darling?”

You shook your head immediately. The way Mason was looking at you with such adoration for you, you wanted that forever.

“Good.” Mason ripped open the condom before rolling it onto himself, leaning in so his hardness was resting against your inner thigh. “Want to watch how beautiful you look as I make love to you.”

Your heart fluttered at his words as he looked down at you, his deep eyes glistening under the amber light as his hand lightly caressed at your hip. You trusted him.

He slipped your matching pink knickers down your body, softly placing them to the side at the bottom of the bed.

“Ready, angel?” His words were so quiet and gentle as he cupped your face in his hand, watching as you nervously gulped before nodding.

Mason’s other hand gripped at your hip in the hopes of aiding him to guide himself in.

“Okay, going to do it slowly, just let me know if you want to pause or stop altogether, alright, sweetheart?” His eyes looked so deeply into yours and you managed to mutter out a small ‘okay’ in response. Seeing how kind and caring he was being made your tummy swarm with butterflies.

He grabbed his dick and softly ran it up and down your pussy, doing his best to spread your wetness around.

Mason gently pushed in his tip, watching as he entered you slowly to ensure he didn’t get carried away before returning his gaze to you.

You took in a sharp intake of air and when Mason felt how difficult it was to push himself in, he knew he needed to not get carried away.

“How’s that feel, angel?”

A tear escaped your eye, falling onto your cheek and making Mason’s heart break. You did your best to compose yourself and stay still, your heart hammering in your chest when Mason kissed away the droplet with a gentle kiss.

“You can c-carry on.” Mason could tell from your shakey voice that you were scared, so he kept his eyes on you as he slowly pushed himself in further.

You winced as he did so, tightening around him and making it difficult for him. Mason managed to somehow fight back a moan but he couldn’t help his cock from twitching in desperation inside you. His cock that desperately wanted to start fucking you fast and hard.

“Doing so well, angel. So, so well.” Mason’s eyes glistened under the low light as he watched your now bloodshot eyes.

“Its okay, just - go all the way.” You mumbled out and Mason furrowed his brows.

“But it’s hurting bad, baby?”

You nodded. “Please just get this part over with.” Mason felt his heart drop. The fact you just wanted it over and done with so quickly whilst he wanted to take his time making love to you broke his heart.

He hoped once you got settled and used to him, the pain would ease up, and so he pushed the rest of the way into you.

You sniffled as he came to a stop, bottoming out inside you. You were gripping him so tightly you couldn’t bare to think about how much worse the pain would get when he moved.

“There we go, good girl. Such a good girl, for me.” The emotion on Mason’s face did wonders to settle your nerves. Seeing how careful and considerate he was being made your tummy flutter, but the pain was still lingering.

“How’s that feel, sweetheart?” He held your face in his hand once more whilst his other gently caressed at your bare skin.

“It’s… ok.” You grimaced.

“Do you think I can try to move?” He asked softly and you couldn’t stop your eyes from filling up with fresh tears at his question.

You nodded softly and Mason gently kissed your lips before slowly moving his hips to begin a slow but steady pace.

He moved his hips and begun thrusting slowly as your pussy continued to grip him so tightly.

“Oh.” Mason did his best to fight back the moans, but he couldn’t help a rouge one from escaping his mouth. “Feel okay, baby?”

When you didn’t answer straight away, Mason begun to panic.

“We can stop, I’ll pull out no-“

You locked your legs around his body, caging him in.

“No.” You did your best to relax your body, trying to adapt to the feeling of him inside you. “I just need to get used to it.” Your pussy pulsated around him and his eyes fluttered shut for a brief moment as he composed himself.

Mason nodded, staying still and waiting for you to decide what happened next. He dropped one hand from holding your body to move some of the hair that had fall infront of your face, gently tucking it behind your ear. He softly stroked at your hair as he patiently waited, staying still snug inside of you. As much as his body was telling him to move, he knew your comfort was way above his pleasure, and he continued to caress your hair. You managed to relax your body, the pain somewhat subsiding.

“I think-I think you can move now.”

“Are you sure?”

You nodded, wrapping your arms around him so your bodies were chest to chest.

Mason slowly begun to move his hips again, thrusting at a gentle pace.

“Is that okay, sweetheart? Do you want me to stop?" He momentarily paused before you had the opportunity to answer and you shook your head.

“It's okay... it feels, it feels okay." Mason had to stop himself from chuckling, never did he think he would be so happy to hear those words during sex. "You can carry on."

He built up a rhythm and when after a few thrusts you let out a moan, he could've sworn it was the sweetest sound he had ever heard.

"Oh, did that feel good, baby?" He cupped your face in his hand and your nodded.

"Mhm, it feels nice." You spoke softly as your eyes fluttered closed and Mason breathed a sigh of relief that sounded a little like a laugh.

"Oh, baby, you deserve it. You deserve it so much, my sweet girl." He tucked his face into your neck as he continued his movements, it all becoming a little too much for him as you continued to let out sweet moans every time he hit your g-spot with every thrust.

"You... you can go a bit faster." The words were out of your mouth before you could even give them a second thought and Mason snapped his neck up almost in disbelief.

"Are you sure, sweetheart?"

You nodded. "Please Mase, you keep brushing against a spot that feels so good, can- can you hit it harder?" Mason groaned into your neck at your words and he begun to fasten his movements, the wet sounds of your bodies intertwining filling the room.

"Fuck, Mase." Your moans made his cock twitch and pulsate, breathy moans leaving your mouth every time he perfectly hit that spot inside you.

"That feel nice, sweetheart? You like me making love to you, yeah?" He swallowed your moan with a kiss as you locked your legs around his waist. "Fuck, you're perfect, feel so perfect wrapped up around me, baby."

He groaned as the kiss broke, looking down and seeing him slip in and out of you, the girl of his dreams, making his head feel hazy.

"Feels so good, Mase, I can’t- oh." You cut yourself off with a moan and he was desperate to throw you over the edge, knowing he couldn’t last much longer with the way you were squeezing around him.

"You're being such a good girl for me, sweetheart." He groaned as you fluttered around him at his words. "Are you going to come for me, baby? Going to come all around my cock, mhm?"

You moaned at his words, letting your eyes fall shut once more.

"It feels so good, I- I-"

"It's okay, baby. Let go for me, let it take over, sweetheart. Just wanna make you feel good." Your pussy pulsated around him as your walls gripped him so tightly, each thrust now feeling like heaven till the final one pushed you over the edge.

You moaned his name as you let the blissful feeling take over your body. Your orgasm spurred Mason on to spill inside you with a groan, muttering little “I love yous” onto your lips.

As Mason came down from his high, he collapsed onto your body, tucking his head into your neck before leaving a few kisses there.

He pulled his head to look at you, fingers gently stroking at your arm. A sleepy smile was on his face. “Was that okay, sweetheart?”

Your head was completely hazy, your body exhausted as you wrapped your arms around your boyfriend.

“It was perfect, Mase.” You beamed up at him, unable to wipe the smile from your face.

“Was it everything you were hoping for?” Mason asked nervously, tugging his bottom lip between his teeth.

“No.” Mason snapped his head up to yours in panic. You giggled, easing his worries. “It was so much more.”

#mason mount #mason mount fanfic #mason mount smut #mason mount imagine #mason mount x reader #mason mount fluff #mason mount blurb

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momentaryescape · 6 months ago

Text

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

Gibbs x Agent!Reader Warnings: Cursing Word Count: 1406 A/N- When I wrote this the vibe for Gibbs is similar to how he acts at the end of season 7 episode 23 when he is taking to the lawyer. It seems really specific but gives an idea for the vibe.

“Was any of it true?” The anger you tried to hide was boiling inside you. You thought you meant something to him. That it was real and not pretend. But here you were, standing in his living room feeling like a fool.

“You knew what this was. It was fun y/n, nothing more. I don’t know what made you think this would be anything but that.” Gibbs seemed like his normal emotionless self. Hell by the looks of it he seemed more annoyed you were bothering him with this conversation

“For months you would get mad if a guy even so much as looked in my direction. Tony brought me coffee and you dismissed him over some bullshit thing he didn’t even do. Mcgee gave me his coat after mine got fucked chasing down a perp and you ignored him for the rest of the case. So nothing my ass Jethro. You want to act like it was nothing but I know that deep down you felt something.” That was your breaking point. You grabbed your stuff before leaving his home, slamming the door on the way out.

~~~~~

“Hey y/n, everything good?” Mcgee gave you a questioning look.

“I’m fine.” You snapped.

“Ohhkay.” Mcgee’s seemed shocked at the outburst.

“Fuck. Sorry Mcgee. I had a rough night. I'm better now, some things have been cleared up.” You smiled back.

“Well if you want a different kind of rough, let me know.” You Didn't see Tony walk up behind you, his comment making you jump in your seat.”Here, brought you coffee.”

“Thank you Tony.” You shot him a flirty smile. Tony winked back at you before sitting at his desk.

Gibbs was watching the entire interaction play out from his desk. He knew what you were trying to do. The remarks of a rough night, the flirty look at Tony. You were trying to get under his skin. He hated it. Not just what you were doing but the fact that it was working.

It had been a few days since the moment you had in Gibbs’ living room. There hadn’t been any new cases the past few days, so the team was catching up on paperwork. Disrupting the silence, Gibbs slaps a hand on your desk.

“Can I help you?” You don’t even bother looking up, already knowing who it is.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Gibbs snapps through gritted teeth. Irritation clearly written across his face.

“Work Gibbs. I have a job to do and that's what I plan on doing.” You still hadn’t looked up from your computer.

“Agent l/n, I expect you to look at me when I’m talking to you.” His outburst drew the attention of everyone around. Questionable faces wondering what the hell was happening.

“Careful Jethro, people might think you have emotions, wouldn't want that to happen.” You looked up at him, clearly annoyed with his presence. Your quip had also clearly pissed him off.

“Leave.” His voice had a bite to it.

“Why? You're the one who came over to my desk, got annoyed I was focused and not looking up at you, and now you want me to leave? I get it, you're the boss man, but I still deserve respect. So give me one valid reason that I need to leave, aside from hurting your “feelings”.”

“Y/n-” Zive tried cutting in before things got more heated.

“Thank you but I’ve got this Ziva. I'm not scared of an emotionally immature man who thinks he can stab me with his words like pins. You want to act all big and bad, but we both know what you are.” You could hear a pin drop with how quiet it was.

“Thats it agent l/n. You need to leave, and until you can act like an adult don't feel the need to come in.” Gibbs was pissed. At this point he was practically yelling.

“Gladly. I would rather be anywhere but near the smallest man who ever lived.” With that you grabbed your bag, collected what you would need to finish your work from home and started toward the elevators.

~~~~~

Gibbs knew he had fucked up. Both in front of everyone and during the original fight. He had cared. He loved to show you off, but always made sure nobody the two of you knew could see. He was a private man, he told himself. But looking back you're the only person he hid. He felt ashamed. You were younger, happier, all the things he wasn't you were.

And now here he was, at your front door. He straightened his stace before knocking on the door. At first he thought you might not be home, but that thought was whipped away when he saw your frame in the open door. He heard you scoff, before asking him what he was doing there.

“I wanted to apologize.” He stated with a small hint of softness.

“Really?” You were calling his bluff.

“Yes, I had no right to yell at you in front of everyone. We should've talked privately.” You rolled your eyes at his statement.

“Yeah I tried that with you, remember? What was what started thin. I wanted to talk and you acted like it was nothing. I'm over it. I can deal with arguments, but being pretty much getting told I was delusional for believing that we had something killed any spark I had.” You meant every word.

“I’m trying here y/n.” His plea fell on deaf ears.

“Next time don't think “I’m sorry” will fix all your problems. You're a grown man Gibbs, act like it.”

“Its always the dramatics with you isn't it?” You scoffed at his remark. “Listen, I meant what I said. What we had, it was great. I’m sorry I said it was only fun. I had feelings for you, but we both knew it wouldn’t last.”

“Why not? Was it not fun once it wasnt forbidden? Once we were seen together was the thrill gone?” You thought back on all the times he would make excuses not to be seen with you. You felt stupid.

“Don't act like you didn't know that this was only meant to be between the two of us.” He knew he was pushing your buttons, but he kept going.

“Are you that ashamed of me? Years of friendship, months of passion, and after that you still hide me away. I don't want to be some secret.” You wanted to smack his chest, cause the same pain he caused you.

“Do you not understand what would happen if they knew? How many rules I broke every time we were together?” He was yelling at this point.

“You know what the saddest part was? I would have died for you, but instead I just died inside. And you deserve prison but you won't serve the time.” You felt hot tears fall from your eyes. The realization you allowed yourself to cry over him fueled your anger. “It's over Gibbs. No second chance. No “it's different this time”. And no more acting like I’m nothing. We still work together. And as much as I would love to say "Good riddance", I love my job too much. I will take punishment for the show he had in the office, but I will not let you take my career.”

He didn’t say anything, he just looked at you, trying to read your expression. Without saying anything you walked to the door, opening it. A silent tell for him to leave. Taking in a slow deep breath you turn to face him. “Leave Gibbs, please.”

“I understand you're hurt y/n, and I know I'm the reason. I will still have your back, and I will still be your boss. But for both our sakes, I think it's best we keep the rest of the details between the two of us.”. You watched him walk out your door, down your steps to his car, and drive away from your home, shutting the door when you could no longer see him. And just like that it was over. No more late nights after cases where you end up in bed together, mornings shared over fresh coffee, and one less friend. Maybe some day the two of you could be friends again, but as for now that wasn’t something either of you wanted, or more realistically could handle.

#x reader #fluff #fandom #reader x oc #reader #romance #leroy jethro gibbs x reader #leroy jethro gibbs #ncis gibbs #gibbs x reader #gibbs smut #jethro gibbs #ncisedit #ncis smut #ncis fandom #ncis fanfiction #ncis x reader #ncis imagine #ncis

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specialagentlokitty · 9 months ago

Text

Aizawa x reader - could you ever forgive me

Looking at your phone a little bit, you frowned as you walked to the apartment.

It wasn’t like Aizawa to message you saying that you needed to talk, and usually it meant there was something serious to talk about.

Letting yourself in, you set everything down by the door, making your way into the living room.

“Shota?”

He looked up from where he was sat on the couch, and you noticed how some things were missing from the room, his work, his laptop, his little collection of books.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong?”

He gestured to the spot next to him, and you walked over, sitting down.

While you kept your gaze solely focused on him, he couldn’t even meet your gaze, instead he focused on staring at your hands.

You reached out, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey? What’s going on?” You whispered.

He took a deep breath.

“I think it’s best if we end things.” He calmly replied.

Your hand fell, and you furrowed your brows in confusion.

“What? Why? Did something happen?”

“I just can’t see a future with you, I’m sorry. I’ve already taken all of my things, I just think it’s better this way for the both of us, I’m sorry.”

Without even giving you a chance to reply he left, and you were left there staring at where he was sat.

You didn’t know what to do, or what to think, for two years you had been living with him, for three years you had been seeing each other, five years since you realised how you felt about him.

So much time you had spent with him right by your side and now he was just gone? What were you supposed to do in that situation?

You didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry, you wanted to believe he was just joking, but you knew him better than that.

You slowly got up, going for a shower where you just sat against the wall with your head in your knees quietly crying.

You couldn’t sleep in your bed, so you laid on the couch but you still couldn’t sleep, you couldn’t even bring yourself to look at your phone knowing you were going to see his face on your Home Screen.

You didn’t sleep that night, so you called your work, letting them know you weren’t feeling well and you would be taking the rest of the week off.

It wasn’t a lie, you weren’t feeling well, you felt sick to your stomach, you felt like this was all just a fever dream, and maybe you’d wake up and it would all be fine, but you knew it wouldn’t.

You hated walking around the apartment because you’d still see his photos up on the shelves, or catch a glimpse of something he had given you.

When you went into the wardrobe you saw he left a few sweaters in there, and you walked around in one of them.

You had tired messaging him, tried calling him, but they all went without a response, you tried his best friend and he said he didn’t know what had happened or why Aizawa ended things.

After nearly a week of being locked up inside your apartment, you went back to work, hoping to distract yourself, but you’d still come home hoping to see him.

Even now, it had been nearly a month since you broke up, and you were sat at work with your friend who placed her hand on your shoulder.

“Come on, you need to change that photo.” She said gently.

“I can’t… if I do I know it means he’s never coming back…”

She sighed softly.

“Come on, let me change it for you, I’ll pick an amazing one I promise.”

You nodded your head, giving her your phone.

You knew she was right, but you also knew what you were never going to be able to change that Home Screen photo by yourself, so you had to get somebody else to do it for you.

She happily handed your phone back with a grin, and you let out a little laugh as you looked at the goofy photo of her.

“Thanks Rosie.”

She beamed brightly.

“I made you laugh! I made (Y/N) laugh!” She cheered.

Putting your phone back in your pocket, you lightly pushed her, making her stumble a little bit.

“I don’t care cause I made you laugh!”

“Go away lurker.”

She walked off cheering, letting you go back to your work.

It took another month for you to start going out worth your friends, and they made a point of going bar hopping one weekend, so you decided to join them and a few of their other friends.

Sitting at the table, you stirred your drink with your straw, watching as a few of them danced around and a guy slipped across from you on the other side of the table.

“Hey, you’re Haku, right?” You asked.

He smiled, giving you a nod.

“Yeah, sorry we haven’t talked much, Rosie likes to drag me along with her whenever so goes dancing. I thought you looked a bit lonely, are you alright?”

You pushed your drink away, letting out a small sigh as you nodded.

“Yeah, I’m just not feeling well. I think I’m going to go home, can you let them know?”

“Yeah, of course. Do you want me to call somebody to come get you or something?”

You shook your head standing up.

“No, I think some air will do me good. Thanks.”

He nodded, letting you leave the bar, and you began to wonder the streets.

You didn’t really want to go straight home, and you started looking for something else to do, and you found a convenience shop still open so you walked in.

Looking around, you crouched down as you looked through some snacks on the bottom shelf, and you found yourself thinking back to Aizawa as you looked at his favourite one.

Sniffling a little bit, you rested your arms on your legs, holding them in your hands.

“Does getting snacks make you sad?” A man asked.

You jumped, letting out a small yell as you threw the bag at him.

It hit him in the face, and he rubbed his face with his hand.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you!” He rushed out.

You wiped your tears away, looking up at him.

He was tall, and thin, a little sickly looking maybe with dark eyes and blond hair, wearing incredibly baggy clothes.

He held his hands up, so show you he meant no harm.

“I just heard someone crying and wanted to see if they’re alright. Are you okay?”

You nodded a little, pushing yourself up from the ground, walking over you picked up the snacks and put them back.

“I’m so sorry I threw them at your face.”

He laughed a little.

“It’s fine, I would’ve done the same thing. It’s late? Did someone hurt you? Are you scared?”

You smiled a little at his concern, and you shook your head.

“No, nothing like that. I’m just tired I guess, I should head home. I’m really sorry again!”

With that you left.

You decided buying snacks could wait until you were sober, so you went back the following night when your head was clear, and you avoided that aisle.

Looking and some other things, you shrugged and tossed some of them into the basket.

You heard movement nearby, and looked over.

“Oh hey, it’s mr chip face.” You grinned a little.

He laughed a little, rubbing the back of his head with a sheepish smile.

You recognised him this time as All Might, the number one pro hero, or at least the retired pro hero now. You’d heard all about it.

“Hi, I hope you’re doing better today.”

“I am, thanks. And thank you for checking on me yesterday too.”

He smiled, nodding his head as he walked over, setting his own basket down.

“I’m Toshinori, I see you are here quite a bit. You always buy snacks, that’s not healthy you know.”

This made you laugh a little.

“Yeah, I know. I just don’t have much effort to cook I guess, and constantly eating out is expensive you know? Oh and I’m (Y/N)! It’s nice to meet you.”

“You’re dating Aizawa right? I think we may have met once at the UA sports festival.”

He watched as your smile immediately fell.

“We broke up…”

“I.. I’m sorry!” He rushed.

You sighed a little bit, shaking your head at him.

“It’s okay, I guess he hasn’t told anybody. It was a few months ago.”

He nodded his head.

“I take it that’s what the snacks are for?” He asked.

“Yeah, can’t beat a bit of comfort food.” You laughed softly.

He smiled at you, holding out a pack of chocolate.

“Have you tried these? They’re good.”

You took it from him, having a look at it.

“I’ll have to try it, thanks.”

You offered him a wave as you left.

You began to see him a little more often around, but usually in the shop where you learnt he was buying snacks for the students.

Eventually he mentioned a cafe, and took you to it.

It became a routine and it was nice to finally speak to somebody new he wasn’t always asking about you and Aizawa, who wasn’t checking you were okay all the time.

It was nice to have caring friends, but after four months you just wanted to move on from Aizawa, maybe that’s why you spent so much time with All Might, but you knew you weren’t ready to be more than friends.

He was nice, and you didn’t want to hurt him by making him into a rebound.

He respected that, he was just happy to have a friend as well.

“You know there’s a Halloween festival going in if you want to go?” He asked.

“Oh cool really? I love Halloween!”

You walked across the cafe with his drink, setting it down in front of him as he showed you his phone.

“Oh they’ve even got a haunted house! I love those! They’re so scary!”

He laughed a little bit, grinning up at you.

“Do you want to go? I’ve never actually been to a haunted house?”

You gasped.

“No way! Toshinori that’s not acceptable!”

He gave a sheepish laugh.

“I guess I’ve never had time, now I’m retired it’s just trying to find things to pass the time I suppose. I have teaching going for me, but that’s not every day. Young Midoriya said I should try do more I haven’t done yet.”

You sat back down in your seat.

“We’ve got to go! Come on! I’ll even be the big strong hero to protect you!”

This made him laugh.

“I don’t doubt it.”

You began telling him all about them, and after a little while longer, he walked you home, making sure you were safe before leaving.

You went in, showered, and changed into a sweater and shorts before heading to the kitchen to reheat some dinner.

You decided you were going to home a movie marathon to yourself to relax.

You had gotten maybe halfway through your second movie when there was a knock on your door.

Looking at your clock, you saw it wasn’t all that late, so you got up, thinking it could’ve been one of your friends.

Opening the door, you came face to face with Aizawa leaning on your doorframe.

“Why’re you here…?”

He lifted his gaze, and you saw he was beat up, blood running down his face.

“I thought you were in danger…”

Taking his hand, you pulled him inside without thinking and closed the door and locked it, leading him into the bathroom.

Sitting him on the edge of the bath, you grabbed a few clothes, rubbing the sink as you grabbed a hair band as well.

You stood in front of him, tying his hair up, and you carefully unwrapped his scarf for him.

You dropped it in the bath and grabbed a cloth, putting it in some water before walking over, taking his chin between your fingers as you began to clean his face.

He carefully watched you, and you didn’t look directly at him.

“Are you okay? Are you safe?” He asked.

“I’m fine.” You replied.

He sighed, and you tilted his head to the side a little so you could get a look at the cut on his face.

“You don’t need stitch’s, hold this.”

Taking his hand you held it to the cloth, grabbing another so you could dry his face.

“Thank you.” He said quietly.

You grabbed his scarf, walking over to the washing machine you turned it on the walked away without another word.

With a sigh he followed after you.

“(Y/N), can we talk?”

“You’ve had months to talk and you didn’t seem interested then.” You snapped.

“I know, I screwed up, I get that, but I have an explanation I you to let me explain my actions, whatever you decide after I’ll respect that decision but you deserve an explanation.”

You sat back down on the couch, and he stood in the other side of the room.

“You have no right coming back, I was just starting to move on… then you have to come back…”

“I know. I left because I thought you were in danger…”

You scoffed a little.

“Your scarf will be clean in a minute, take it and go away.”

He walked over, setting the cloth on the table, and he sat next to you, he took out his phone and held it out to you, showing you a message.

“I got a text from an unknown number saying they were going to come after you, so I thought if I kept my distance they would leave you alone. The police were working on tracking down this person and arresting them, we’ve just brought him into custody. I know it was irrational of me to just leave, I know I hurt you, but I owe you an explanation.”

You didn’t say anything, you just got up and walked away so he trailed after you.

“(Y/N).”

He reached out, taking your hand, and he spun you around, placing a kiss to the palm of your hand, and held it to the side of his face.

“I can’t see a future with anybody but you, and I love you, only you. If you don’t want to see me ever again I understand, but I’ll keep looking out for you, and I’ll keep you safe, no matter what happens between us you’ll be safe.”

He gave you a smile, leaning down so he could press a kiss to your cheek, then he moved back.

“I never meant to hurt you so much…”

He walked to the washing machine, taking out his scarf and he tossed it in the dryer, staying there while you kept to a different room.

You wanted to run into his arms and forgive him, you wanted to just hold him tight but how could you after so much pain you went through trying to move on?

Could you find it in your heart to ever forgive him?

#my hero academia #my hero academia x reader #my hero academia x you #my hero academia imagine #mha #mha x reader #mha x y/n #mha x you #mha imagine #Aizawa #Aizawa x reader #Aizawa x you #aizawa x y/n #Aizawa imagine

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